STIGMA
TAKING BACK CONTROL
Choosing an alcohol-free lifestyle meant confronting peer pressure and ‘ sober shaming ’, says Scott Woolley
I
first became sober curious in 2012 . At that time , there was no sober curious movement , no term for it , and the alcohol-free drinks market didn ’ t exist ( other than Beck ' s Blue ). The Dry January challenge hadn ’ t emerged , so there was no social proof , no community , and little visible support or alcohol prevention outside of crisis intervention . I felt alone .
From 2013 to 2015 , I tried taking breaks from alcohol , drinking only a handful of times in that period . But ' sober shaming ' and peer pressure made it difficult to stay alcoholfree for longer than I ’ d have liked .
In 2015 , I was sober shamed during a night out and told ‘ All this no drinking , it needs to stop . You need to knock this on the head .’ That moment pushed me to commit to a one-year alcohol-free challenge . I was nervous about abstaining forever because of stigma . I didn ’ t want to spend the rest of my life explaining why I wasn ’ t drinking . I needed time and perspective to understand my relationship with alcohol . After completing my first year , I extended my alcoholfree challenge by another year and then decided to commit to lifelong abstinence .
One of the hardest parts of participating in the Dry January challenge – or any alcohol-free journey – isn ’ t just exploring our own relationship with alcohol , but dealing with how others react . If we haven ’ t had a rock bottom moment or accessed treatment , it can be challenging to explain why we want to stop drinking .
Over the years , I ’ ve often heard , ‘ You don ’ t have a problem , so why stop ?’ Many still view drinking on an outdated spectrum – either you ’ re fine or you ’ ve lost control – the mentality
I was nervous about abstaining forever because of stigma . I didn ’ t want to spend the rest of my life explaining why I wasn ’ t drinking .
of drink as much as you can ( as long as you don ’ t hit rock bottom ). But the reality is , alcohol affects us all differently . It ’ s not about how much we drink , but how it affects us .
Sadly , stigma exists in two forms when it comes to alcohol – one for those who have been in crisis or sought help , and another for those who choose not to drink . The judgment of not managing a relationship with alcohol or ‘ failing ’ to stay in
control is where individuals can be labelled and exposed to exclusion and judgment . When we choose not to drink by preference , we face a different kind of stigma – sober shaming , as well as exclusion and judgement . In my experience , the less of a ‘ problem ’ it seems to others , the more we ’ ll be questioned on our decision to quit .
Both types of stigma are harmful , and create barriers to people seeking support or making positive changes to their relationship with alcohol , no matter the reason .
In a community poll for our sober collective Arclett , stigma was voted as a bigger barrier to becoming alcohol-free than cravings , showing just how powerful and damaging stigma can be . People can stop or reduce their drinking , but choose not to because they ’ re worried about the spotlight it shines on them .
Around 200,000 people took part in the Dry January challenge this year , adding social proof for those looking to pause , stop , or improve their relationship with alcohol . But sadly the choice to be alcohol-free still carries stigma . Once the one-month challenge ends , we ’ re often back to explaining why we don ’ t drink – because alcohol remains the only drug in the world we have to justify not using .
To highlight the growing social proof , the Dry January challenge , which started in 2013 ( with just 4,000 participants ), saw over 175,000 participants in 2023 . It ’ s amazing to see how much the conversation around choosing not to drink has evolved , and how much more accessible it is for those curious about life without alcohol .
There ’ s still work to be done , but I believe we ’ re heading in the right direction . The goal isn ’ t to live in a society where alcohol doesn ’ t exist , just where we don ’ t have to justify why we ’ re not drinking , and where there are fewer alcohol harms .
I am not anti-alcohol , I am pro-choice , and at Arclett we ’ re committed to reducing the stigma surrounding an alcoholfree lifestyle . By normalising sobriety , we create more space for healthier choices and make it easier for people to seek support when they need it .
Scott Woolley is founder of Arclett . Find out more here : www . arclett . com
Scott ’ s story is featured by the Anti Stigma Network ( ASN ) at www . antistigmanetwork . org . uk . Get involved to tackle stigma , share resources and join a growing network that ’ s driving change
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