When kids lie, it shows they understand other
people have different desires, feelings and beliefs – a
quality that enables empathy and cooperation. And
kids seldom lie intentionally to betray or hurt people.
While you don’t want this developmental lying to
turn into a life-long habit, it’s important not to treat
your child as if they’re on their way to become social
deviants on the first onset of lying. The impulse to
nip this immoral behavior in the bud might make it
tempting to dole out a harsh punishment or a good
tongue-lashing. But when dealing with kids and
lying, it’s important to first understand their motive,
then follow through appropriate consequences that
don’t inspire more lying.
Why Kids Lie
• Avoid punishment. One of the most prevalent
reasons why kids lie is to avoid punishment or an
unpleasant outcome.
• Seek approval. Sometimes the motive for lying
can be a cry for more attention or acceptance. It’s
not uncommon for kids to lie because they don’t
want to disappoint their parents. They would
rather tell a fib than have a parent think less of
them.
• Get a reaction. One of the more surprising reasons
why kids lie is because they love seeing a reaction
from people. So if you catch your child telling
an outlandish story, it might be because they’re
trying to make an impression.
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