Perhaps most importantly , we must adjust our expectations of what it means to be a good wife , husband , mom , dad , and human being . We need to set realistic standards for ourselves . We are constantly striving to be the perfect parent who successfully juggles all the things , and that ’ s why we are burning out . The more we strive for perfection , the more we realize we cannot reach it . It stresses us out and makes us feel like we can never measure up . As Diana Spalding says in her piece on Motherly titled “ Self- Care is Not Enough to Fix How Much Moms are Burnt Out , “ It ’ s time that we stop telling moms that a simple act of self-care will undo the years of culture-induced overwhelm that is causing us all to burn out .” You don ’ t need an extra glass of wine , you need to reject the ideologies that are crushing your spirit .
The kind of self-care that will end your burnout is big and bold because it will require you to stop swimming with the current . You ’ ll have to embrace your messiness . True self-care asks you to make tough decisions about what belongs in your life and what doesn ’ t , about what gives you joy and what takes it away , and about what feeds your soul and what depletes it . You ’ ll need to make conscious choices and take intentional steps toward creating your own beautiful world , and I know that is so much more daunting than a mani-pedi , but the end result is a life that excites you rather than drains you , and there ’ s no need to escape to the bathroom from that . •
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