In addition, scientists have discovered that we appear
to have two operating systems. The first is controlled
by our right brain and parts known as the “reptilian
brain.” It’s instinctual, quick, and often subconscious.
The second system is controlled by our left brain and the
neocortex, and it is slower, conscious, and analytical.
Intuition is part of that first operating system. Kelly
Turner, Ph.D. says “In other words, intuitive decisions
are not something that we thought out carefully with
reason but rather choices that have arisen quickly out
of instinct.” (Source) Researchers have also found that
the first system often knows the answer well before
our second system, and studies have shown that most
often, our “gut instinct” is correct.
When making parenting decisions, going with your
gut instinct almost always leads to better outcomes.
I remember a crucial turning point in my parenting
when I finally stopped ignoring my gut instinct and
discovered something really important about my child.
My second son was born when my firstborn was two.
Over the coming months, my firstborn’s behavior
began to change. I had already been well warned about
the “terrible twos” and assumed he’d hit them a little
late as he was now about to turn three. This kind of
behavior was, in my mind, to be expected, and I was told
I needed to “get swift control” before it got entirely out
of hand. As he passed his third birthday, his behavior
continued to take a nosedive, and my frustration grew.
I tried all sorts of methods to gain his compliance, such
as behavior charts, counting to three, and time-outs.
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