Solution One - Predictability and Choices
Strong-willed children like to be in control , so providing a consistent routine or daily rhythm will help them feel more in control of their daily life . Give your child a voice as you establish house rules , and he ’ ll be more likely to follow those rules . Allowing your child to make lots of reasonable choices will also feel empowering to them . When strongwilled children are forced to submit to another person , they will become stubborn and uncooperative , but when we provide choices , they become less oppositional .
Solution Two- Loving Boundaries
In order to see improved behavior , it ’ s important to set loving boundaries . You want to convey to your child that you are not at odds ; you ’ re a team . Tone and perspective are your two most important points , because they will determine how you approach your child and how your child accepts your instruction .
Start by explaining expectations , not in a warning tone that is projecting your mistrust but in a “ heads up ” tone . Demonstrate that you believe in him and you ’ re on his side . “ We ’ re going on this nature walk and I know you get excited and it ’ s fun to run but I ’ m not comfortable with that because it ’ s not safe . I ’ ll give you a signal or sign to know you need to wait and let us catch up . If it doesn ’ t work , we will hold hands .” Don ’ t view holding hands as a punishment but as help and connection . “ I love you too much to let you go running off .”
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