Using traditional discipline methods on strong-willed children will only fuel power struggles . These children are not easily manipulated or controlled . They challenge authority , so when you try to discipline with a “ control over ” approach , they will naturally challenge you , leading to fierce power struggles .
The first key is to understand your child ’ s behavior . Then we will look at three solutions for successfully parenting your strong-willed child .
Behavior is Communication .
Behavior provides a window into the child ’ s emotional world , and it gives us clues as to what the child is experiencing . We need to pause and listen . This is especially important in strong-willed or intense children because they get overwhelmed even more easily . When a child ’ s behavior is off track , it could be because her reason centers are being overwhelmed by emotion or stress . Again , this is particularly true in sensitive or intense children . Often we feel that their behavior is deliberate , but more often it ’ s that they can ’ t stop themselves . He may know , for example , that he shouldn ’ t run ahead in the parking lot , but he cannot stop himself from acting on his impulse to run .
This doesn ’ t mean we let it slide or give up , but rather that we step in and provide predictability , clear expectations , boundaries , and positive discipline to keep them safe while their brains are still developing .
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