1 . Listen to the chatter of your toddler or preschooler . Why ? You ’ re making deposits and building rapport . Kids will only talk to you if they feel like you ’ ll listen , especially when they get older . Focused attention , eye contact , and thoughtful responses now mean a child who feels she can open up to you later .
2 . Engage in side-by-side conversations . Often we want to sit our kids down face-to-face and have a deep , meaningful conversation , but many children are more likely to open up when you ’ re either busy doing something together , such as playing ball or watching a show , or if you ’ re not making direct eye contact , such as when you are in a car . Sometimes a face-to-face chat is great , but other times it can cause a child to clam up , especially if the tone or body language is off . If you want your child to communicate more , create opportunities for conversation while you are side by side and engaged in something .
3 . Hold your tongue – at first . Parents can be quick to dish out advice or even criticism , but be careful with your words . If children feel that you ’ re going to be judgmental , they may look for a peer to confide in instead . Of course , children need our guidance even when they aren ’ t asking for it and don ’ t want it , but it ’ s best to be a great listener first . You ’ ll be able to feel if your child is currently open to hearing your hard-earned wisdom or if they may need a little time . When you do give advice , try not to lecture . Keep it short , and end with showing faith in your child to do what ’ s right .
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