All children want to be enjoyed , not just tolerated . Are your interactions upbeat , positive , joy-filled , warm , loving , and fun ? Or are you merely displaying patience ? Are you being silly ? Are you laughing and smiling a lot ? Joyful interactions communicate “ I ’ m having fun with you ! I love being with you !” When you ’ re having a great time with your kids , they feel that needed sense of belonging , and it fills their cups to the brim . It doesn ’ t take hours a day to have fun . You can add in quick daily rituals and habits that speak love .