“ Hey love . How was your day ?” I ask gently . “ Ok ,” he replies , his eyes not averting from his window stare . I can read the signs in his expression . Give me a minute . I need to rest . I don ’ t ask any more questions but my eyes dart from the road to my rearview mirror as we pull out of the school ’ s parking lot and make our way back to the freeway . I turn on his favorite song and crank it up . His expression softens , and he starts to visibly relax .
School is a place of unrest for my boy , as it is for many children . There is a constant pressure to perform , not only for teachers but for peers . Children have to navigate tough social situations , adjust to busy schedules , absorb tons of information , and are expected to act beyond their age and development . This is the reason we often get the afterschool meltdowns , a release of pent-up emotions the child has been holding inside and now finally feels comfortable enough to let out . For highly sensitive children like my son , those feelings of unrest are magnified , as are all of their emotions .
Regardless of emotional sensitivity or personality , all children need emotional rest to grow well . Dr . Gordon Neufeld , a developmental psychologist and founder of The Neufeld Institute , discusses the need for emotional rest in his Relationship Matters course . See a clip here . To summarize , Dr . Neufeld mentions these three ways in which we can provide our children with emotional rest .
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