Controversial Books | Page 210

Return to Jerusalem 205 sack loaded with gasoline tins, followed us into the restaurant and decided to stand vigil at our table. The proprietor was not amused. He came roaring out of the kitchen with a soup ladle. A waiter rushed up with pot covers and began to beat them like cymbals in the animal's ear, while the ladle hammered a drumbeat on its piously bent head. A second waiter began cursing and tugging at the motionless beast, but couldn't budge it. It just blinked its eyes and withstood the combined assault with astonishing aplomb. "He must be very hungry," Moustafa observed. "He'd make a good soldier," I said. "Look how calm he is under fire." Just then the donkey's owner rushed in. He was an elderly Bedouin with a straggly beard and was shaking his whip excitedly. I suppose he shouted the equivalent of "How dare you steal my donkey, you cur!" because the words were no sooner out of his mouth than the proprietor rushed on him with the ladle, followed by the first waiter who brandished the pot covers like shields before him and pounced on the old Arab. With a magnificent sense of timing the donkey halted the proceedings by unceremoniously arching its tail and dropping its manure on the spot. While the proprietor and his waiters looked on speechlessly, the donkey deftly turned around and made a quick exit, followed by its master, who leaped on its back as soon as they reached the sidewalk. Off they trotted in a dust cloud. "Ma'alesh. Let's eat." The waiter with the pot covers returned with pan and broom, and cleaned up, cursing loudly. I went into the kitchen and ordered by pointing to pots and pans on the stove containing what I thought I would like. I ordered a plate of rice with lamb and tomato sauce; another of chickpeas with lamb, seasoned with paprika. I topped this with yoghourt and drafts of water. The sight of two soldiers in khaki passing by outside made me jump.