CONNECTIONS QUARTERLY SUMMER 2023
WELCOME
WHAT IS BELONGING ?
By Bob Mattingly Executive Director , CSEE
Instinctually we have a pull to belong to a group , as our ancestors who were a part of a group probably were more likely to eat food than be food . Even people who are energized by being alone need , and are part of , a group .
We belong to some groups the moment we are born : biological family , race , and nationality . We are raised as a part of a variety of groups such as a socioeconomic class , neighborhood , or school . An important mark of growing into adulthood is deciding the groups where we as individuals want to belong .
But what does it mean to belong ? Belonging is not simply physical proximity . I might join another family for their Thanksgiving dinner and be welcomed , and maybe honored , at the table , but I would be a guest and might not necessarily feel I belonged . At the same time , someone may have moved away from the community where they were born and grew up , and as an adult still feel a deep sense of belonging to that community , even after many years of distance .
Many independent schools have evolved to see “ belonging ” as a facet of how they wish to be understood . This is a great aspiration , but one that requires a school community to think deeply about both the concept and the reality of their community . Having various kinds of people present is diversity and those various people may be happy or content but that does not mean that they experience belonging . Going back to the example of being a Thanksgiving guest , even if I am enthusiastically welcomed and have a great experience , I still might not experience belonging .
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CSEE Connections Summer 2023 Page 1