PARTNERING FROM WITHIN
So how can schools support lighthouse parenting? My advice has nothing to do with booking the latest big-name expert for a parent event and has everything to do with harnessing the knowing that already exists within your school community. We can provide opportunities for parents to approach children with more curiosity than certainty; less expertise and more Stanley King-style 2 reflection and deep listening for the sake of authentic understanding.
As educators, we know that families are eager for their children to reach their greatest potential— academically, socially, and emotionally. We also know the challenges that arise along the way.
Any kindergarten teacher will tell you it’ s completely developmentally expected that their students will be curious, not only about where they came from but also how they got in there and, eventually, how they got out into the world.
Middle school parents’ patience will be pushed to the limit with pleas to access social media and gaming devices— and the inevitable unseemly pics that show up on the sixth-grade group chats.
We know upper school parents are familiar with this phrase:“ You’ re the only parents who _________ [ take your pick or fill in your own: have a curfew, track whereabouts, won’ t allow parties with alcohol.] You’ re ruining my life.”
“ My advice has nothing to do with booking the latest big-name expert for a parent event and has everything to do with harnessing the knowing that already exists within your school community.”
So how do we help parents prepare for these predictable moments? Not by telling them how to handle it— but by providing opportunities for them to reflect and figure out what works best for their child and their family.
Unfortunately, not every child wants to have that conversation, even when parents try their very best moves: encouraging texts, car entrapment, or leveraged privileges. Here’ s where schools can help foster these critical conversations designed, first, to help parents better understand their child’ s reality, and second, to honor and support the inner-knowing within parents. In other words, here are a few ideas to help schools be a lighthouse for the parents within their community.
• Engage in student / parent dialogue: For each grade, host a yearly event
2. https:// www. csee. org / page / SKI
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CSEE Connections Fall 2025 Page 13