KIDS AREN’ T THE ONLY ONES
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programs encouraging parents to get to know one another and support each other.“ Parenting is hard and lonely,” he notes.“ Parenting is a joy, but also a lot of work. Nobody notices the hard work. Parents need outlets to talk about their struggles raising children.” And, he adds,“ schools have to give parents the message that your kids are fine; they’ re right where they are supposed to be.”
Running the Race at Your Own Pace
In addition to feeling lonely, parents worry more now about an uncertain future. Will their children have what they need to live a good life, which for many middle and upper-class families includes admission to a competitive college and a well-paying job afterward?
Dr. Murthy warns that the comparison culture propagated online is“ intensifying” and setting“ unrealistic expectations around the milestones, parenting strategies, achievements, and status symbols that kids and parents must pursue.” Parents may feel that even though they are running an arduous race at a frenetic pace, they’ re falling still further behind.
Thompson mentioned a book he’ d written a number of years ago entitled The Pressured Child, in which he urged allowing children to experience their
“ Thompson believes that schools can help combat this crisis of loneliness by hosting regular parent coffees and educational programs encouraging parents to get to know one another and support each other.
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school journey— for better or for worse— in their own way and at their own pace. Displaying his wry sense of humor, he cited a problem that no school has ever been able to solve:“ Each year, 50 % of the seniors are in the bottom half of the class.”
Parents may imagine that“‘ if I know more, I’ ll change my child’ s trajectory,’” Thompson said. But he adds that in trying to make minute changes at the margins, parents risk missing the big picture: allowing one’ s children to take the lead in navigating their educational and social pathways through school helps them grow into less anxious, more resilient, and decidedly more independent beings. All of which can help parents, too.
Page 4 Fall 2025 CSEE Connections