FOCUS ON THE
FAMILY
Connecting With Your Child
To connect with our children, we
must understand their emotions and
experience those emotions with them.
Let’s see how one mother, Sheri, spent
her morning connecting with her 5-yearold son, Nicholas.
7 a.m. — Nicholas wakes up screaming.
Sheri runs to Nicholas and holds him tight.
“You sound scared. What’s wrong?” she
asks. But Nicholas doesn’t respond; he
just cries. Sheri continues to hold him
until he calms down, saying, “Whatever
it is, you’re really sad. I’m here for you.”
Soon, Nicholas stops crying and asks for
breakfast.
What Sheri did right: Sheri acknowledged
Nicholas’s feelings. Instead of telling
Nicholas to stop crying, Sheri labelled
Nicholas’s feeling and allowed him the
chance to express that feeling. Nicholas
sensed that it was okay to be sad and
scared. Nicholas will likely feel free to
express these feelings in the future.
Sheri tells Jacob the same and takes
Nicholas aside. She tells him, “Nicholas,
I know you’re mad. It upsets you when
Jacob pushes you. You need to tell him
not to push because pushing hurts.”
What Sheri did right: Sheri focused on
Nicholas’s negative behaviour while
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