Time to Be Selfish
Think of the safety demonstration on
an aircraft. In case of an emergency,
we’re instructed to secure our own
oxygen mask before assisting the
person next to us. While this may
seem selfish at first, the logic is
undeniable: We need to make sure
that we get sufficient oxygen so that
we can be of assistance to others.
Failure to do so puts us at risk and
renders us of little use to those
around us.
The same can be said for the role
and responsibility of a coach.
Unless you look after yourself and
get that oxygen, you’re no good to
your clients. Once you are ready to
be selfish, you are one step closer
to making the kind of sustained
behavior change that is required to
be at your very best and consistently
add value to your clients.
when you’re stressed, frustrated or
anxious), it gets very loud, very quickly.
This absorbs all your cognitive energy
and leaves next to nothing for the
poor old PFC. As a result, decisionmaking and situational awareness
are significantly compromised.
These are often the times when we
say something that we shouldn’t or
misunderstand what is happening
around us. Think of that angry email
or text message sent in the heat of
the moment.
If we want to be at our best, we
need to make sure that we’re giving
the PFC the clear air and breathing
space that it needs to operate at a
consistently high level.
You can take the following four steps
on a daily basis to achieve this. These
facilitate your own wellness, but
you can share them with clients to
support them, as well.
4. Run on six cylinders. Individuals
who make poor lifestyle choices
are not as mentally focused and
have lower self-confidence, lower
energy levels and lower overall life
and work fulfillment.
In 2009, my colleagues and I took
a closer look at the variables at
play here and cross-checked our
observations with the available
empirical evidence. As a result, we
were able to isolate six key areas
that facilitate wellness. We call
these the six cylinders of wellness
and the evidence shows a causal
link between these behaviors and
wellness outcomes including stress
levels, mental alertness, energy,
self-esteem, memory, sex drive, life
fulfilment, focus, concentration and
overall levels of happiness.
These six cylinders include
nutrition, activity, sleep, time out,
social connections and our outlets.
Making good decisions across
these six cylinders helps all of us
to be at our very best, particularly
when dealing with change, stress
and inevitable life challenges.
Small Steps
27
As with all behavior change, this is
not about making wholesale changes
to your life. Small, easy-to-maintain
changes facilitate sustained change
over the long term. As such, you should
start with the elements that make the
most sense to you right now.
Coaching World
Research points to two disciplines that 1. Do the hard things first. Your
PFC tires easily throughout the
combine to facilitate your wellness
day, so if you have an important,
profile: neurological wellness (i.e., your
complex or difficult task on your
cognitive and emotional wellness) and
agenda, attempt to complete it
behavioral wellness.
early when you are well-rested
The Neurology of Wellness
with a fully functioning PFC. This
The latest advancements in
is particularly true when you’re
neuroplasticity and neuro-leadership
having challenging conversations
have shown us that it is possible
and making complex decisions. It’s
to shift your cognitive capacity and
also why the old recommendation
thought patterns in order to build
to ”sleep on it” remains relevant.
resilience, increase your focus and be
2. Focus on one thing at a time.
at your best.
Multitasking is a sure way to
Let’s begin by looking at the battle
scramble your PFC, but it’s also
between the prefrontal cortex (PFC)
how most of us manage our
and the limbic system. Your PFC sits
days. The human brain works
in your brain’s frontal lobe and is
best when it’s dedicated to a
responsible for complex reasoning,
single task with laser-beam focus.
such as problem solving, memory,
You can’t achieve this when the
learning and decision-making. These
phone is constantly ringing, you’re
are all critical functions for coaches.
distracted by social media and
you have one eye on your inbox.
Your limbic system is the complex
To unlock your cognitive potential,
web of structures right in the middle
allocate sufficient time and space
of the brain across both hemispheres.
to important tasks, get out of the
The limbic system is the center of
traffic and see how much sharper
your emotional responses. When this
powerful structure is activated (e.g.,
your thinking becomes.
3. Manage your limbic threats.
Regardless of personality,