not anticipated was that it would
also present a profound new
set of work/life balance issues
that would send me on a soulsearching expedition.
Even if you have a strong
business plan and an extensive
professional network, building
a Leadership Coaching and
consulting practice takes time.
Suddenly, I was not as busy as
I used to be: I did not have to
spend an hour or two processing
email every evening, nor did
I have frequent 6 a.m. or 10
p.m. calls. I could schedule a
doctor’s appointment without
juggling to fit it in my schedule
and I could finally plan lunch
dates with friends or business
connections during the week.
Although I genuinely enjoyed
this new flexibility, I quickly
started to judge myself as being
far less efficient than I used to be
according to my own standards. I
did not like my new “laziness.”
Even more unsettling was the
feeling that the productivity skills I
had developed and honed through
the years were turning against
me, polluting nice moments with
feelings of guilt and unease, and
making me question my own
worthiness. These feelings would
wash over me when I overslept
in the morning, spent an hour of
my day chatting on the phone
with my sister or watched an
episode of a favorite TV show after
dinner. In each of those instances,
an unfriendly inner voice would
remind me that I ought to be
spending my time more wisely,
perhaps by knocking a couple of
items off my long to-do list.
It took me time to realize that the
issue was not my new schedule
but that the very same standards
that I valued so much before were
now obsolete. My career change—
22 Coaching World
and consequent life change—
mandated that I review my
fundamental relationship to time,
my time-management habits and
beliefs, and my personal definition
of productivity. Essentially, I
needed to redefine what work/life
balance meant for me.
I already understood that our
needs and wants evolve with
time: I had previously revised
my personal work/life statement
when I changed jobs, when I gave
birth to my second son and when
I moved to the United States with
my family eight years ago.
This personal journey also taught
me a very important lesson that I
am finding useful in my leadership
practice. It is OK to let go of beliefs,
practices and values that we used
to live by—even those that used
to define us—when we realize
they no longer serve us. And as
importantly, only we can decide it
is time to let go, even if we become
aware of the need to do so with
the support of a coach. It is part of
that continuous growth journey
we are on as human beings.
But the change I went
through when I moved
from being a corporate
leader to a solo
entrepreneur was
on a much different
magnitude and scale
than I had anticipated.
As a result of this selfdiscovery journey, I
learned that it is OK to hop
on my elliptical trainer at 10
a.m. or 3 p.m., and that there
is no need to send a proposal at
10 p.m. if I’d prefer to watch a
movie with my husband. I also
discovered that weekends are not
“sacred lands” anymore: They do
provide time for productive work.
I have learned to let go of the
boundaries that I had built and
strived to abide by in order to
achieve my earlier definition of
work/life balance. They were no
longer useful and were actually
standing in my way.
Work and play now integrate
in my life as a coach in a much
more flexible way. As a result,
my new personal work/life
statement is far less prescriptive
and far more fulfilling as it
closely aligns with the life I have
chosen t o embrace.
“I have learned to let
go of the boundaries
that I had built and
strived to abide by
in order to achieve
my earlier definition
of work/life balance.
They were no longer
useful and were
actually standing in
my way.”