“ I ’ m so sorry , Zoë .” Craig kept shaking his head . His eyes were rimmed red and his breath stank like sour whisky . “ I ’ m so sorry .” The absence inside me , a deep black hole . Cassandra , my baby . You never stood a chance .
* My hopeful future had disappeared into a box . Craig moved to pick up the mobile of animals and heat kindled in my chest . “ Stop it !” I screamed . Craig whipped around . “ She ’ s dead , Zoë . Let her go .” “ You killed her ,” I said , my voice low . He advanced , closing the space in two strides . His hands gripped tight around my neck and he propelled me against the wall . My teeth rattled as my head smacked the door frame . I gasped for breath , clawing at Craig ’ s fingers , inhaling air laced with the scent of alcohol .
He shook me , fuming . “ You ’ ve pushed me too far , Zoë .” His grip tightened . Craig ’ s silhouette took on a fuzzy edge .
I fumbled for the opening in my hoodie . My fingers grasped the solid , biting shard and wrapped around it , slippery with sweat .
* Afterwards , I ran into the hallway and emptied my stomach . I ’ d never imagined it would happen like this , but I had kept my vow – he would never hurt me again . Me or Cassandra . I supported myself with one trembling hand against the wall . My fingers were stained with splotches of blood .
A long , howling sob drowned out my fluttering heartbeat . It took me a moment to realize the sound emitted from my own throat , coming up and out of me from some place deep inside . I let it out and when I collected myself , I dragged myself downstairs and out into the night .
Cool air flowed around me – life flourished everywhere . Coyotes in the distance , cries of owls in the trees , cacti mice scurrying in the dark , avoiding the jaws of desert snakes coiled in the sands , scales still warm from baking in the day ’ s heat . The house behind me was silent , heavy lids shut over tired eyes . Lackluster shafts of light glowed through drawn curtains . A brighter moon glowed overhead , fighting through small whiffs of clouds .
I took a deep breath , inhaling all the life that surrounded me . All the possibilities . Where I could possibly go now , what I could possibly do .
28 Cauldron Anthology