CARIMAC Times 2016: The JREAM Edition Journalists Reviving Awareness of what Matters | Page 28

When she began recounting her experiences,
her words were barely audible.

However, things changed later when she found
a teacher who could empathise.

“Everything started with a rumor,” Rhoden
said in a very hushed tone.

“I got close with one teacher, and I could
express myself to her in a different way, and she
understood ‘cause she used to go through the
same thing… I could talk to her about anything
and she would give me advice on how to go
about it …”

Her reserved disposition upon meeting was
quickly driven away by the onslaught of painful
memories the conversation would unearth
from a burial place.
“News started spreading that I was hitting on
one of them [her classmates], and everyone
started to see me differently, even though that
wasn’t the case.”
Thereafter, it got to a point where her classmates
began to use what little Spanish they knew to
taunt her.
“In every class they would call me ‘el pescado’.”
In English, this means ‘fish’ — one of several
terms used colloquially to describe people who
are perceived to be homosexual.
Rhoden, who played football, said she was too
manly for the girls in her class. They would
keep their distance because they automatically
assumed she would hit on them. This persisted
and progressed further as she began to make
friends. Rumours began swirling around
school that Rhoden and her new friends were
romantically involved.
“All of a sudden I started hearing that I wrote
a love letter in Spanish to one of my friends,
and then she stopped talking to me after that. I
reported it, but the teachers didn’t do anything
about it… said I should just let it go.”

The teacher told her to isolate herself, focus on
her work, and to not let anyone have an effect
on her. But the effectiveness of that strategy
was short-lived.
“I was very emotionally depressed… It did drive
me over the brink for a while.”
The hurt lives on
Things got wors e for Rhoden when her mother
learned of rumours concerning her daughter.
“My mother came to school. She tried to pull
me from football; went to the teachers saying I
was not to participate in anything and I should
stop being in the company of a certain person…”
Her mother believed the rumours and proceeded
to beat her at school before the football coach.
At this point in the interview, Rhoden started
to cry. I asked her if she needed some time to
compose herself. She replied: “Yes, a whole lot
of time; probably like three years.”
With tears still streaming down her face, she
explained how that moment and past experiences
resulted in an “unintentional suicide” attempt.

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