and an athlete . They are aware of their values , strengths , and priorities and make decisions based on those values and strengths . This level of awareness reduces performance anxiety , reduces stress , and builds self-efficacy and selfconfidence . However , this level of self-awareness requires more than most people realize . One of my favourite explanations of the process says the term “ personal growth ” is misleading because it sounds like it ’ s going to be fun . But if we called it “ deliberately making yourself so uncomfortable , you feel like you ’ re dying ,” nobody would do it .
3 . Focus only on what you can control
When I work with athletes and teams like the Ontario Blue Jays , we work on identifying what is within their control and what is not . This is an important skill , as we all have a finite amount of energy , and wasting that energy focusing on things we cannot control diminishes our performance . Things within an athlete ’ s control include attitude , level of effort , and thoughts and emotions . While many athletes are very good at controlling their effort , few are good at mastering their mindset , feelings , and thoughts , especially when facing adversity or difficult times .
A skill that mentally tough athletes are very good at is problem-solving . When you learn how to problem solve in the face of adversity , you also develop the attitude that you can handle anything that may come at you . Combining problem-solving and knowing what is and what is not in your control is a powerful combination that reduces stress , enhances creativity , and improves the chances of success . Problem-solving allows an athlete to adapt faster to their situation and circumstances . Often is not the most talented athlete that wins but the one that can adapt the fastest to the situation .
4 . Accept that you will make mistakes and let them go
Carol Dweck , a psychologist at Stanford University and one of the world ’ s leading researchers on motivation , looked at why some people succeed and others ( with similar or even more talent ) do not . Carol noted that the people that succeed have a growth rather than a fixed mindset . One of the most significant findings was that people with a growth mindset viewed making mistakes and failing as critical to success . In contrast , people with a fixed mindset tended to avoid criticism and challenges if there were a chance they would fail . A personal example was when I was playing rugby in Hong Kong . Our team , Sumitomo Bank , was facing a professional team from England . The team had three players from the English national team . I noticed that my teammates had two different reactions . Some responded with a fixed mindset , complaining that it was unfair , we would lose , and worse , be embarrassed . However , some ( the minority ) were excited to play against the best in the world . They could not wait to see how they ranked in comparison and talked about how cool it would be to beat them . One group worried about their ego and failure , while