PHOTO : PATRICK HODGSON
PODCAST
We ’ ll share our entire illuminating , hour-long conversation with Antonio Michael Downing , a . k . a . John Orpheus , on the July 14 , 2021 episode of the Canadian Musician Podcast . it for the love and the enjoyment . But you ’ re definitely not in it for the wrong reasons at this point . Because there ’ s way easier ways to make money and there ’ s way easier ways to be validated . It becomes about the communion with the people , the fans , and the exchange of energy . Really , without that , I certainly would be doing something else .”
There is a major lesson Downing learned through the process of writing the memoir that has immeasurably improved his life , both professionally and personally . That is , the realization that trauma doesn ’ t go away when you ignore it . Being disappointed by his estranged parents or childhood sexual abuse , for example , which Downing says he honestly didn ’ t think anything of as an
44 CANADIAN MUSICIAN adult . He didn ’ t connect it to his relationship issues or compulsivity .
“ I had all these challenges that I didn ’ t know why . It was just my life and it was just difficult for me . Like , people would say things like , ‘ We don ’ t know which you is going to show up .’ Then I came to figure out that , actually , all this stuff that I thought wasn ’ t part of my life , just because you want to be done with it , it doesn ’ t mean it ’ s done with you ,” he says . “ We think putting it behind us and ignoring it is overcoming it . But actually , it ’ s engaging with it , understanding it , and then making peace with it ; that ’ s what actually allows us to move on .”
While Saga Boy and Saga King are inextricably linked , as the album would not have happened ( at least in its current form ) without the book , both for psychological and practical reasons . But Saga King is not a musical retelling of Downing ’ s story .
“ As records go , it was pretty straightforward to make . But it ’ s also a lifetime . Like they asked Picasso how long it took to paint one of his paintings and he said ‘ all my life .’ That ’ s how long it took to make this record ,” he explains . For him , the book is the journey of the boy and the album is the celebration of the man who has processed his past baggage . “ That ’ s why we changed the name to Saga King instead of Saga Boy , because I just felt like I had arrived at this place of wholeness and home . That sense of belonging I ’ ve been chasing my whole life . I felt like I had it , I arrived , at that kind of sovereignty and empowerment over yourself . I was like , that ’ s the sound of this record for me .”
That said , there were practical reasons for making this album , too . Following a marketing meeting with the folks at Penguin Random House Canada , he remembers thinking , “‘ Wow , they ’ re going to just do this huge publicity campaign around a book ?’ I ’ m an independent musician , so I ’ m like , ‘ Y ’ all going to spend how much to promote