film by Keiron Self
THE LONE RANGER ***
Dir : Gore Verbinski ( 12A , 143 mins ) Ah , the western , a mainstay in Hollywood cinema until the 70s ; it ’ s only occasionally that this genre flickers back into life with the likes of Unforgiven , Open Range or The Proposition . The Lone Ranger isn ’ t a western , however ; it ’ s a lavish event movie rebooted from an outdated 50s TV series that most people aren ’ t that aware of , and a considerable summer risk , despite having the Pirates Of The Caribbean team attached . Jerry Bruckheimer produces , Gore Verbinski directs and Johnny Depp takes the reins as Tonto , the Native American sidekick who moves centre stage in the series whilst Armie Hammer ’ s Lone Ranger fades in good-looking fashion into the background amidst some spectacular set pieces . Noisy , script-addled but peppered with fun moments , The Lone Ranger is an exuberant but ultimately uninvolving prarie mess . A train crash is directed with vigour , there are moments of double actdom with Depp and Hammer , but they add up to little in the melee and a talented supporting cast featuring Tom Wilkinson , Ruth Wilson and Helena Bonham Carter barely register . Not an out-and-out disaster on the scale of say the Wild Wild West remake , another western TV show given a reboot , The Lone Ranger is more Hey-ho Silver than Hi-Ho Silver , kemosabe . Opens Aug 9
ELYSIUM ****
Dir : Neil Blomkamp ( 12A , 120 mins )
The director of District 9 returns with another futuristic tale of haves and have nots . Instead of the alien ‘ prawns ’ marooned in South Africa and their human counterparts , Elysium has the age-old battle between rich and poor . The year is 2154 and those who have wealth can afford to live off Earth in a space station haven called Elysium , where Jodie Foster caters to their every need from cancer cures to lovely views . Earth , however , is an overpopulated mess : food is in short supply , violence is everywhere , and Foster does all she can to secure the exclusivity of Elysium despite the planet dwellers constantly trying to get in . Matt Damon plays Max , a resident of LA in and out of trouble with the law . Although trying to go straight he finds that he has to get into Elysium to save his life . Tooled up and modified with a variety of exo-skeleton appendages , he endeavours to get past the elite forces of Elysium ; in particular Sharlto Copley ’ s ruthless killer . Sci-fi with a social conscience , this is all about immigration , responsibility and revolution . Blomkamp again succeeds in creating a realistic future dystopia , Jodie Foster perfects her ice queen , Damon is as ever a likeable everyman , and the SFX are grungily integrated into an all too well imagined future . Opens Aug 23
2 GUNS ***
Dir : Baltasar Kormakur ( 15 , 90 mins ) Another action comedy with two mismatched buddies going up against each other , and the mob , with slick results . Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg are two undercover operatives , one working for the DEA , the other for naval intelligence , who find that they have both been set up by the mob . The police are now on their trail along with baddie Bill Paxton who has a handy line in torture involving bulls . There are plenty of one-liners and Washington and Wahlberb make an engaging couple ; even if the film does feel like another retread of Lethal Weapon / 48 Hours / any buddy cop film . Paula Patton , fresh from ass kicking in Mission Impossible , is relegated to girlfriend duties , and the action is solidly spectacular . Washington reliably adds meat to the proceedings and Wahlberg does another mouthy cop under Icelandic director Kormakur ’ s tutelage with whom he also made the middling Contraband . 2 Guns doesn ’ t quite fire on all cylinders , but it ’ s not just shooting blanks . Opens Aug 16
THE CONJURING ****
Dir : James Wan ( 15 , 112 mins ) A genuinely unsettling haunted house story made all the more shocking as it comes from schlockmeister director James Wan , who set the wheels of Saw in motion and gave us the silly jump-fest Insidious . Based on a true story ... and then heavily embellished , this follows real life psychic investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren – played by Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga – as they go to a creepy haunted house in 70s America . So far so Amityville Horror , and although director Wan is treading on well worn formulas ( poltergeists , witches , creepy dolls ), he manages to rachet up the tension brilliantly . Lili Taylor is superb as the petrified mother trying to protect her daughters from the supernatural menace and the shocks when they come are shocking ; a creeping dread pervades the entire film . It ’ s an old fashioned ghost story done with aplomb that doesn ’ t sacrifice character for schlocky scares . A superior horror . Opens Aug 2
RED 2 ***
Dir : Dean Parisot ( 12A , 115 mins ) A surprising sequel for a moderately entertaining action caper based on the DC Comics graphic novel RED Retired And Extremely Dangerous . Surprising as the first film was ok but hardly seemed like a franchise starter , but hey Bruce Willis , John Malkovich , Helen Mirren and Mary Louise Parker are all back and joined by further star wattage in the shapes of Anthony Hopkins , Catherine Zeta Jones and leapy about martial artist Byung-hun Lee . This time out Willis and Louise Parker are dragged back into killing people after they are named in a Wikileaksesque document saying they know all about a top secret weapon called Night Shade . Soon all the covert agents from around the globe are on their trail with Helen Mirren becoming an enemy this time out . Malkovich shines and provides most of the laughs amidst the action as the psychotic Marvin . It ’ s amiable , if slightly Republican , with the cast clearly having a blast and mostly letting the audience in on the joke . Opens Aug 2
ALSO RELEASED : PERCY JACKSON : SEA OF MONSTERS ( 12A ) More Olympian hijinks with Poseidon ’ s son as he searches for the golden fleece with a comedy centaur sidekick and a plucky warrioress . Like the first Percy Jackson but with new monsters and everyone looks a bit older . GROWN UPS 2 ( 12A ) Yes , they let Adam Sandler do this . The world is a cruel and unrelenting place . BACHELORETTE ( 15 ) Kirsten Dunst , Isla Fisher and Lizzy Caplan are asked to be bridesmaids for a girl they all ridiculed in their youth . This year ’ s indie style Bridesmaids with added