Bounce Back In Style 2nd Edition Edition | Page 32

Focus on building a relationship by having a good understanding of who you are committing, what
you are committing to and decide from the beginning whether both of you are the right fit or not.
Find out about her and her family because you will be dealing with the whole package. The key element for long lasting relationship is not similarity but compatibility. The scripture says that God
promised to make a helper suitable (or compatible) for Adam. If Adam was not promised a helper
similar to him, be rest assured that you are not getting a helper similar to you. In fact a helper similar
to you will be boring and blank. You will do the same things and like the same things but it won’t be
fun. It is our differences that make life fun and great.
The word “helper is an acronym for:
H- Someone that holds you
E – Someone that embraces you no matter what
L – Someone that is willing to labour with you
p- Someone that Pray with you and for you
E- Engages and empowers you
R – Someone that Rescues you.
2.

Do You Laugh?

Make sure she makes you laugh and smile because laughter
is very important in sustaining long time marriage. Does
she bring out the best in you even in worse situations?
Does she see things from a different perspective from you?
This is crucial because you are going to have moments in
marriage when you will cry and moments when you will
laugh. But can you laugh together, with each other and at
each other?
My wife and I met in college at a parochial end of year
meeting. I remember us chatting for about 10 minutes before the meeting started and saying our goodbyes after the
meeting. From that moment I could not stop thinking about
her. I was not thinking about her person but how interesting her ideas and mannerism especially how she laughed at
the few jokes that I got in within the shot time we chatted and how she was very much interested in
what I had to say. The next time we met it became obvious to me (and I think to her) that we had a
strong chemistry between us. That evening we met on our way to the cafeteria to eat dinner but we
ended up talking through the evening past dinner time.
That friendship grew from strength to strength as we invested more and more time in the relationship. One thing that was evident from the very beginning was that I made the jokes and my wife
brought the laughter. She talked most of the time, I listened most of the time but both complimented
each other.
That relationship has continued till today. We laugh a lot and but we argue a bit especially during at
the early years of our relationship. We preferred being with each other in the same place over being
in different places with other people. Does that mean that it’s all fun, bliss and laughter when we are
together? No, in fact we disagree and argue more than your average couple out there. Sometimes we
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