I think the advice is well, late if you will. Experts should not be telling you how to hold back, how to mitigate regrets, or how to incentivize a man to marry you. What they should be saying -- what the CSA has always said is – don’t waste your mistakes. We experience heartbreak and rough relationships and we are supposed to draw wisdom to do better in the future; not draw back to hope and pray we feel no pain from heartbreak. Anything that requires vulnerability has the risk of hurting; it also has the possibility of pure pleasure. That potential pleasure should be the incentive.
Imagine the man that makes you feel free. Imagine the man that reciprocates your actions, your thoughtfulness, and your level of love. Imagine the man that takes the time to speak your love language; helps you with your kids; fixes your car overnight. The man that wakes up at 5 am to walk your dogs so you can sleep late. The man that has gone to help your family out of a jam. The man that kills any and all insects, big or small. The man that stands behind you and gives you that hug while you are washing dishes, and says, “Baby, I love you.”
Still want to hold back from him?
Ladies, the way to potentially avoid heartbreak is to choose better who is in your life. You are the gatekeeper to your dating world. Draw from your experience to pick the best man to give your everything. Men are not the prize. Women are not the prize. Love is.
I say all that to say this, The CSA says do not change HOW you love; change WHO you love.
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