Bossy! Magazine Issue 24 November 2018 | Page 10

Big Love:

iS POLYAMORY AN OPTION FOR YOU?

Polyamory has become a bit of a term-du jour among “woke folk” and “free thinkers” but does everyone who endorses polyamory know what the term means? And have they done the work of examining themselves and their motives before diving into a relationship that has consequence and ripple effects for many more people than just themselves?

If you’re considering a polyamorous relationship, here are five questions to ask yourself before you take the plunge.

Why do I really want to be “poly”?

Polyamory and non-monogamy are not the same things. Many people try on polyamory because they don’t enjoy the restrictions and confines of a monogamous relationship. But Polyamory is not just a way to sleep with other people- and there’s no shade if that’s your jam. Monogamy isn’t for everybody. But neither is polyamory. in polyamory the focus isn’t on sex, but love and relationship. Sex takes some effort (if you’re doing it right) but polyamory takes some time, effort, commitment, and sacrifice. Like an actual relationship. If you’re really just looking for a variety of sexual partners perhaps an open-relationship or even –gasp!-being single is right for you.