Black Bag Bridal
In every issue we feature advice from one of ourfavorite wedding pros , Deborah McCoy of American Academy of Wedding Professionals . Deb has over 20 years of industry insights and experience . Have a question ? Write to her at deb @ blackbagbridal . com
could act as his father ’ s best man , if he hasn ’ t as yet designated one — or be a junior groomsman . His daughter could act as a bridesmaid , or as your maid of honor ( if you ’ re close to her ). Whatever option you choose , they would be at the altar with you , giving you their support . Happy Weddings !
Hi Deb : I am marrying for the first time , in my late forties . My future husband , however , has been married previously . What are your suggestions as far as being a first-time bride at my age , without looking ridiculous ?
Thanks , Mayra in Alabama
Dear Deb : I am marrying for the third time and my fiancé more than me . We want to have a great celebration with our close family , children and friends . What do you suggest ?
Regards , LaDawn in Minneapolis
Hi LaDawn :
Hi Mayra : Here are my suggestions . One , wear a stunning dress , not necessarily a wedding gown in white , ivory , or blush . Wear a headpiece with a veil , if you choose , as a fashion accessory . No blusher ( face veil ). Carry a nosegay . Two , have only a maid ( matron ) of honor and best man . And walk yourself up the aisle . You , after all , are a strong , independent woman . At the reception : Begin with introductions and first dance . Dance with your dad and your groom with his mom . Have the best man conduct the toast . Cut the cake and celebrate your happiness . Skip the bouquet / garter toss , which is in the realm of the younger , first-time bride . In summary : Keep it simple but traditional . Celebrate !
Happy Weddings , Deb
I would do something as far from a traditional wedding as possible . Think outside the box ! Host a generic party at a private club , restaurant or your home — and as a surprise , get married ! Have a DJ ready behind the scenes , and along with the food , get a wedding cake , toast your future and have a great time : Celebrate ! Then go on a romantic honeymoon and enjoy your happiness !
Dear Deb :
Happy Weddings !
My children are driving me crazy concerning my upcoming wedding . They are older , married , and have children
Hi Deb : My future husband has children from a previous marriage that we would like to include in the wedding ( one boy 15 , one girl , 20 ). I have never been married , am older ( as is my fiancé ), and would like to know how to handle of their own . They insist upon participating in the ceremony and if that occurs , my future husband ’ s children will want to do the same . In our opinion , this is going to end up being a three-ring circus , which is the last thing we want . Can you help ?
Thank you , Susan in Texas this issue tactfully .
Thank you , Betsy from California
Hi Betsy : When it comes to planning weddings for older , more sophisticated folks , I normally advise on having a maid ( matron ) of honor and best man , only . However , I understand your and your future husband ’ s desire to have his children included . It only makes sense . And considering the age of the children , you do have options . One , the boy
Dear Susan : It ’ s YOU who is out of control . You ’ re the mom , not the other way around . Put your foot down ! This is YOUR wedding , not your children ’ s . You need to gather your children together and explain that when it comes to your wedding , that you will do it your way . If they don ’ t consent to help and support you , then threaten elopement . And there ’ s nothing wrong with eloping !
Happy Weddings ! Deb
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