Bermuda Parent Bermuda Parent Spring 2015 | Page 33

I look?), performance (how am I doing?), and relationships (how important
am I?). The development of positive self-image is important because it affects
how we feel about ourselves and how we interact with others. A positive self-
image boosts our social, emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing. While
having a negative self-image decreases life satisfaction across these areas.
A mothers’ tone and body language about her own self-image can affect
her daughter in the long term. Even when mothers provide positive feed-
back about their daughters’, making negative comments about themselves
negatively impacts their daughters’ self-image. Similarly, mothers’ negative
comments about other women can also impact her daughter’s view of her-
self. When mothers accept how they look, and have a healthy attitude about
weight, wrinkles, and aging, this helps to counter the peer and media pres-
sure her daughter faces. Similarly, when mothers don’t feel they measure
up to society’s beauty standards, they pass on those feelings of inadequacy
to their daughters. Even the slightest comments that a mother makes about
herself, such as, “Does this outfit make me look fat?” or “Oh wow, look at the
awful wrinkles around my eyes” will influence her daughter.
The good news is that self-image is fluid and can be changed. We
can foster the development of a healthy self-image in our daughters and
ourselves. The process begins with accepting and loving our self and being
accepted and loved by others.
How can mothers foster a positive self-image
in their daughters?
• Set the example, talk positively about yourself.
• Comment on your daughter’s positive qualities.
• Reassure her that it is okay to make mistakes, a mistake or a poor choice
does not define her.
• Identify and explore the impact of childhood labels – how did people
describe you as a child? Was it positive or negative? Is the same thing
happening to your daughter?
• Refrain from comparing her to others. And refrain from comparing
yourself to others as well.
• Share positive affirmations – “We are powerful beyond measure,”
“We are intelligent”.
• Keep in mind that you are both unique and celebrate differences.
• Remember that you are her most important role model.
Because daughters unconsciously identify with their mothers’, all moth-
ers have the power and responsibility to shape their daughters’ positive
self-image. This is achieved by teaching daughters that a female’s value is
not based only on outer appearances, but on her inner essence, by talking
to daughters in sensitive ways throughout life, and by authentic self love and
acceptance. In doing so, mothers can go a long way to ensure their daugh-
ter’s future mental, emotional, and physical health.
References:
Lapa Sussman, J. (2012). How mothers impact their daughter’s self-image. Retrieved from Total
Health Magazine: totalhealthmagazine.com.
The Cleveland Clinic Foundation (2013). Fostering a positive self-image. Retrieved from Cleveland
Clinic: my.clevelandclinic.org.
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