FRAN GARDNER
Al was my kindred spirit.
My husband, Al, and I shared 34 magical years raising our son and daughter, enjoying our grandchildren and extended families.
Al’ s PSP journey ended peacefully at age 69. The grace and bravery that Al demonstrated during his journey and in his final days, well, those things just came naturally for Al. As tough as the PSP years were, Al harnessed every small joy, and I was blessed to have made his final years with PSP good quality years.
Early months of bereavement: in shock
The loss of his presence was immense.
I took time out to heal and regain energy.
• As I transitioned from anticipatory grief to loss, I felt numb, physically and emotionally exhausted. The loss of his presence was immense. A month prior to losing Al, I lost my father. After these collective losses, I developed my own medical issues. With my family’ s support, I took time out to heal and regain energy.
First holiday season: unexpected gifts
• My spirits are lifted with the birth of our third grandchild, Ruby. I felt Al’ s happiness looking down on this blessing.
• I dread the upcoming holidays. An awesome friend presents me with an unexpected gift— a glass heart with a photo of Al in his pre-PSP days and Al’ s words“ I love you” etched into the glass.
• I plough through paperwork and sort through Al’ s clothing for donation.
The new year: venturing out
• I accept a dinner invitation with a close-knit group formed during the PSP years. While caring for Al, I co-planned a movement
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