JANET RICE FINNEY
Your journal, your journey
Journaling comes easy for me. It’ s where I go when I have been unable to verbalize my feelings. When my husband died, the pen and paper on my nightstand were old friends waiting to hear my story.
I write what I am feeling. I write as if no one else will read it. That helps me to be more honest with myself. I know I need to dig deeper into the guilt, anger, fear, or sadness to help myself. I use words to come to the hard stuff. At the beginning of my grief journey, I found expressing myself through words to be fairly easy because my feelings were raw, and I wanted to ease them. Some people find rereading the journals therapeutic. I did not and still don’ t six years later. It takes me back to the places where I was at my most vulnerable, and I’ m not ready to do that. Not yet.
As I continue to write about the thoughts and stressors I’ ve harbored, I finally come around to the healing power of gratitude. I list the things that make me feel better about the world— comforting thoughts that help me sleep better.
As you read the stories that follow, you can use the note pages to start your own journey.
Journaling works better for me as an unplanned activity, rather than sticking to a daily or weekly schedule. There’ s no reason to put more pressure on yourself, especially early on in your journey. Every word counts. Maybe you’ ll write two lines or two pages. Just keep going. Perhaps you’ ll write a book or a series of poems— the writing may start a new chapter in your life.
Don’ t worry about what you say or how you say it. You are not passing an exam because no one’ s going to read it, remember?! This is your journal and your journey, and no one else will feel exactly as you do or express it as you will.
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