BANZA August 2016 | Page 97

CASE FILES She is obviously going to be ashamed of that particular part of her body. And worst, she might grow up thinking that women are meant to be cowards! The same goes with expressions such as “you are such a D.” Associating being a jerk with such an important part of the male anatomy is subconsciously programming young boys to be what people call “f**boys.” Like Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie said: “The problem with gender is it prescribes how we should be, rather than recognizing how we are.” Such expressions define the identity of males and females without even giving them the chance to create their identity. Similarly, the fact that boys are praised when they manage to sleep with several girls when girls are called all sorts of names when doing the exact thing is straight up sexist. I am not in the position to judge or define how one’s sex life should be, and I never will. I just wonder why boys are not called names when they sleep around. The second and last troubling thing with my C-word experience is the fact that my father never answered me when I asked him what it meant. Indeed, speaking or even mentioning this part of the female anatomy has always been taboo as though it is something shameful. I firmly believe it’s time for the world and women to change these perceptions. Not only will this help the woman to be more comfortable in her skin, but also, be aware of other beauties and complexities of her anatomy. The problem with gender is it prescribes how we should be, rather than recognizing how we are. There are so many other misconceptions around both genders that need to be corrected for our community to prosper. You and I make up this society. Our actions will either break or make the world we live. It starts with small but impactful actions like not calling your friend a C or D the next time he or she acts like a coward or jerk.