Clean Speech; Toronto, Ontario, 2015
“I think that for people who are
heartbroken, it’s almost like time slows
down to a much more gradual pace.
“I think the worst part about heartbreak
is that if you think about what it takes
to let somebody into your life or what
it takes to fall in love or even just trust
someone enough to make a new friend;
it takes vulnerability.
“And I think the worst part about when
your heart is broken or when you get
betrayed or somebody leaves you, is
that the first thing you do is you start
regretting letting them in, trusting them
and being vulnerable. And you sit there
and you think ‘I’m so stupid. Why did
I do that? Why did I trust that person?
Why didn’t I play mind games with them?
You’re supposed to mess with people’s
heads that’s what everyone says but I
just let them in. Why did I do that?’ And
I just want you to know that you can
regret a lot of things in life and regrets
are valid but ‘trusting someone, letting
someone in and being vulnerable’ are not
valid regrets.
“You should never feel stupid for doing
any of those things. Then, you have to
move on, right? You have to replace
all these moments where you let that
person into your life and you have to fill
in the holes where you made space for
them and it’s hard in the beginning, I’m
sure. But what might end up happening
is you start replacing time you spent with
that person with friends who actually
care about you and still want to be in
your life. And maybe the decisions you
start to make are no longer based on
what someone who you’re in love with
might want you to do. Maybe they’re
based only on what you want to do.
“Little by little you start filling in the gaps,
and more and more each day, you start
to forget like heartbreak was written
across your forehead and then one day,
whether it’s a year later or a month later
or three years later or seven days later
you look in the mirror and you don’t see
heartbreak written anywhere on you
anymore. And in that moment, you’re
clean.”
This speech is beautiful and delicate
in so many ways. She talked about
getting over a heartbreak. No, not just
the typical romance heartbreak, she also
talked about the heartbreak of losing
someone you trusted so much because
of a betrayal. The speech highlights the
vulnerability of someone breaking down
their walls to let someone into their
hearts.
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