FOUR WAYS TO
Fiercely Love Yourself
THE PROBLEM WITH THE SELF-CARE TREND
by Kristin Magdalene
W
e know we need to take care
of ourselves more than we
actually do. We see these strong,
powerful women on screen, and
we desperately want to be them.
We want to command a presence,
to demand respect, to run our
business and our lives – and we
want to look damn good doing it.
Self-care is incredibly important
because it teaches us to continue
to grow and evolve into better
versions of ourselves, into who
we want to be. However, the self-
care movement has become a
trend that glosses over the real
issues. Half of the articles on
self-care are for those who with
some form of depression who can
barely function, with encouraging
reminders to drink water and avoid
foods you’re allergic to, while the
remainder basically encourage
some form of indulgent escapism,
by having drinks with friends,
splurging on pedicures, or eating
dessert.
48 • BADASSERY MAGAZINE
Don’t get me wrong, I would never
discourage any of the above,
especially dessert, but confusing
self-care with consumerism is
dangerous. Actual self-care is
about love and acceptance of
where you are in the moment,
to me to be a strong, independent
woman. I took speech and debate
classes, and I’m more than
comfortable speaking in front of a
crowd. I took martial arts lessons
for years, and I still know how to
defend myself. I went to church
“ACTUAL SELF-CARE IS ABOUT LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE
OF WHERE YOU ARE IN THE MOMENT, GOOD OR BAD. IT
IS LESS ABOUT TREATING YOURSELF AND MORE ABOUT
MOTHERING YOURSELF.”
good or bad. It is less about
treating yourself and more about
mothering yourself. It is a daily
process that is not only integral
to have a functioning society, but
in short, actual self-care will help
you build a life you don’t need to
escape from.
Growing up, my parents wanted
multiple times a week, and now I
try to understand, empathize with,
and have compassion for everyone
I come across. And because I was
raised with many feminist values, I
love who I am and how I look, and I
have no problems eating rich foods
and ordering dessert afterwards. I
have always had the confidence to
move through the world and take