MON MARI, MON AMANT, MA VIE
Anne Francine Akiba
60
My husband, Charlie, is my angel. It’ s been four years since he passed, and he surrounds me always. I feel him every day. It’ s as though someone is touching me and telling me to be calm and that everything will be okay. I miss his touch, his hand on my hand. We were very affectionate. I loved when we would sleep together, and he would read until 4 in the morning and rub my back for hours. When he would stop, I would move my shoulders up and down to signal him to keep going. He would chuckle then.
When I lost him, it was like losing a limb. It felt like something was always missing. He was my baby, my son, the love of my life –“ Mon mari, mon amant, ma vie.” He was my big love. Many people say your lover has to be your best friend for it to work, but that wasn’ t the case for us. He was always my lover, never my friend. We made love. I will never be complete until I meet him again.
All my kids are my angels too. They are all present in their own ways. My son, Brian, lives in Paris and calls me two to three times a day when he feels like complaining. Jonathan calls me all the time like there’ s a catastrophe when it’ s nothing at all. I have Jeremie, who is quiet and sweet and calm. And then I have Sarah, who makes me crazy with clothes and her apartment. I also have my daughters-in-law, Jessica and Hila, and my four beautiful grandkids.
They keep me going, but I’ m a strong woman. I do a lot of talking to myself. I have my downs for a few minutes, but then I tell myself,“ There are so many poor people with nothing and no one. I have passed bad times, but I am fortunate. There are many less fortunate than me.” That’ s what life is all about. You have good and bad times, but this is what is written for me.