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suicide
I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man
standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over
and said “Stop! don’t do it!”
“Why shouldn’t I?” he said.
I said, “Well, there’s so much to live for!”
He said, “Like what?”
I said, “Well...are you religious or atheist?”
He said, “Religious.”
I said, “Me too! Are you christian or buddhist?”
He said, “Christian.”
I said, “Me too! Are you catholic or protestant?”
He said, “Protestant.”
I said, “Me too! Are you episcopalian or baptist?”
He said, “Baptist!”
I said,”Wow! Me too! Are you baptist church of god or
baptist church of the lord?”
He said, “Baptist church of god!”
I said, “Me too! Are you original baptist church of god,
or are you reformed baptist church of god?”
He said,”Reformed Baptist church of god!”
I said, “Me too! Are you reformed baptist church of god,
reformation of 1879, or reformed baptist church of god,
reformation of 1915?”
He said, “Reformed baptist church of god, reformation
of 1915!”
I said, “Die, heretic scum”, and pushed him off.
I THINK I’M A MOTH
A guy walks into a dentist’s office and says, “I think I’m
a moth.”
The dentist replies “You shouldn’t be here. You should
be seeing a psychiatrist...”
The guys replies, “I am seeing a psychiatrist.”
The dentist says, “Well then what are you doing here?”
And the guy says, “Your light was on.”
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WRITING’S POWERFUL MESSAGE
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed
a desire to become a “great” writer.
When asked to define “great” he said “I want to write
stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people
will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will
make them scream, cry, wail, howl in pain, desperation,
and anger!”
He now works for Microsoft writing error messages.
nigel farage
By a happy coincidence, Nigel Farage’s initials are NF.
Nigel Farage says that homosexuality makes most
people over 70 uncomfortable. I’m guessing they’re just
not using enough KY Jelly.
Nigel Farage has written to all Scottish MPs asking them
not to vote on English matters,
Quite right! What do they know about Sharia Law
anyway?
13
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