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lazy wife
A man has been married for several years and is fed up
with the grotty house, the stacked up dirty dishes, and
wifey forever lazing around on the lounge in dressing
gown and curlers watching soapies on television.
“Right, that’s it, enough is enough!” He thinks to himself,
and at work the next day he phones up a lawyer friend
and asks him if there is any precedence of a ‘legal’
murder. The only thing the lawyer could come up with
was to screw his wife to death.
“Thanks mate, I’ll give it a go.”
When he gets home from work, he grabs his wife by
her rollered hair, drags her kicking and screaming to the
bedroom, rips off her tattered fluffy gown, and proceeds
to hammer her holes every which way possible. After a
few hours, she finally collapses and lays lifeless on the
bed. He checks for vital signs, and satisfied he’s done her
in, collapses into the best sleep he’s had in years.
Waking up to go to work the next morning, the wife is
still laying in the same spot as he left her. He whistles
merrily as he shaves and showers, and is ecstatic as he
drives to work. He hasn’t felt this fantastic in years! He’ll
arrive home from work, find the body, and call the police
to say she has died from a heart attack during a hectic
sex session the previous evening. Perfect!
He gets home that afternoon and walks through the front
door. He can’t believe his eyes! The house is spotless!
The kitchen is sparkling, and all the clothes that were
clogging up the laundry are washed and neatly pressed.
The next thing, here comes the wife down the stairs,
pretty dress on, hair perfect and made up beautifully!
In a semi state of shock he asks her what in the living
hell is going on.
She just gives him a wink and a smile and says,
“You look after me love, and I’ll look after you.”
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HUA HIN SOI 88
085 429 0378
Motorbikes for Rent
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Bath Night In Scotland
A Scottish couple took in an 18-year-old girl as a lodger.
She asked if she could have a bath, but the woman of the
house told her they didn’t have a bath, although if she
wanted to, she could use a tin bath in front of the fire.
“Monday’s the best night, when my husband goes out to
darts,” she said.
The girl agreed to have a bath the following Monday.
After her husband had gone to the pub for his darts
match, the woman filled the bath and watched the girl
get undressed. She was surprised to see that the lass
didn’t have any pubic hair. She mentioned this to her
husband when he came home. He didn’t believe her, so
she said: “Next Monday, when you go to darts, leave a
little early and wait in the back garden. I’ll leave a gap in
the curtains so you can see for yourself.”
So the following Monday, while the girl again got
undressed, the wife asked: “Do you shave?”
“No,” replied the girl. “I’ve just never grown any hair
down there. Do you have hair?”
“Oh, yes,” said the woman, and she pulled up her
nightdress and showed the girl that she was really
generously endowed in the hair department.....very
generously indeed. The girl finished her bath and went
to bed. Later that night, when the husband came in, the
wife asked him, “Did you see it?”
“Yes,” he said, “but why the hell did you have to show
her yours?”
“Why ever are you worried about that?” she said. “You’ve
seen it often enough before.”
“I know,” he said, “but the dart team hadn’t!”
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