AWOL 2014 Issue 300 19th September | Page 11

Advertise here from only 40 baht per week s&S Indian Soi 94 Certificate of Excellence restaurant 2012, 2013, 2014 Curries from only 90 baht Eat in or takeaway 081 455 5298 Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 19 You will be granted an uncommonly long life, though an uncommonly large part of it will be spent getting into bus accidents. Aquarius Jan 20 – Feb 18 There will be a brief cease-fire in the age-old war between the sexes as both sides cooperate in hunting you down and trying you for war crimes. Pisces Feb 19 – Mar 20 The flaw in your plan was the part where your accomplice would start a fire, and in the confusion, you would sneak into the philosophy department and finish writing your dissertation. Aries Mar 21 – Apr 20 It’s important, as Kipling said, to treat triumph and disaster both the same, but it seems all you ever get are mild satisfaction and vague disappointment. Taurus Apr 21 – May 21 You’re trying to live healthier, but you’ll continue refusing to give up cigars, since they’re still the best way to light the dynamite you throw into children’s hospitals. Gemini May 22 – June 21 You will soon be judged by a jury of your peers, which is a good thing, as people who weren’t also self-centered drunken assholes would probably want you dead. Cancer Jun 22 – Jul 22 You’ll ask the tool salesman for a drill press that can bore all the way through a bowling pin the long way, but he’ll know damn well what you really want it for. Leo Jul 23 – Aug 22 You’ll be asked to give up your destructive patterns of behaviour by concerned people who love you but don’t understand how much fun it is to destroy things. Virgo Aug 23 – Sep 22 The blessed arrival of a baby in your life would be greeted with a lot more joy if you could figure out who mailed it to you. Libra Sep 23 – Oct 23 Investigators on the scene of the accident will say there was nothing you could have done, unless you count not stomping on the gas and driving straight into the huge tanker truck. Scorpio Oct 24 – Nov 21 Someday, people will have healthy, well-adjusted attitudes toward sex, but until then, you can still have it occasionally. Sagittarius Nov 22 – Dec 21 Your ravenous hunger for human flesh will be quashed when you find out how it’s made and how much artificial crap is in it. SALES AND RENTALS NEW DEVELOPMENTS - PRE-OWNED HOMES CONDOS & APARTMENTS - VILLAS & HOUSES RESORTS - BUSINESSES - LAND Contact: Tel.: 082 298 0500 E-mail: [email protected] Website: luckyhuahin.com Join the AWOL forum 11