Visit www.awolonline.net
chelsea
pensioner
Drogba returns to Chelsea to die
london, england
STRIKER Didier Drogba is dragging
himself back to Stamford Bridge to end
his days, the club has confirmed.
The player, who enjoyed his glory years
at Chelsea, has somehow sensed his
own forthcoming demise and is limping
thousands of miles to die in the place that
loved him best.
Sport scientist Denys Finch Hatton
said: “It’s an extraordinary natural
phenomenon.
“These creatures, magnificent in their
prime, use some rudimentary homing
instinct to find their way through a
baffling maze of contracts to live out their
last moments showered with applause
from fans.
“It’s almost as if they’re intelligent.”
Left: Didier Drogba (73) in pre-season training
practising his death scene
Other footballers who have made the same
journey include Henrik Larsson, whose
bones lie in the 30 yard box at Helsingborg
and still contribute the occasional assist.
Drogba, who is currently leading a herd
of international footballers across the
Asian steppes, is expected to arrive for
Chelsea’s first game of the season.
He will walk slowly onto the pitch, commit
a last two-footed career-threatening
One Stop Service
tackle, then die when an opposing player
retaliates to win his team one final
penalty.
Jose Mourinho said: “It will be a majestic
sight.
“Unlike Frank Lampard, who has travelled
to New York to live out his final days in
complete anonymity and will die there,
alone and forgotten, in a back alley.”
Construction
P. S.
24
House Sales •
• Legal Services
Land Sales •
• Visas
Projects •
• Work permits
Permits etc.. •
• Insurance
GROUP Tel./Fax: 032 472589
[email protected]
• Translations
46 Netelon Road, Cha Am
• Company Registrations
• Travel services
• Copy/Print/Fax etc
Mon - Sat. 9am to 6pm
032 890218
[email protected]
339/52 Ruamchit Road (Beach Rd.)
Near Soi 5, Cha Am
See also our advert on page 5
Sell it fast with AWOL Classifieds