AWOL 2014 Issue 274 14th March | Page 11

Advertise here from only 40 baht per week s&S Soi 94 Indian restaurant Curries from only 75 baht Eat in or Takeaway 081 455 5298 Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 19 After becoming a routine victim of bedbugs, you’ll make history as the world’s first victim of chair-, wall-, and all-over-the-catbugs. Aquarius Jan 20 – Feb 18 It comes down to whether or not you can play an instrument or drive stick, but no, you won’t get the girl this time, either. Pisces Feb 19 – Mar 20 You’ve always said that if you were king, you’d make college free, but there won’t be time between your coronation, the palace coup, and the beheading. Aries Mar 21 – Apr 20 Your daughter’s memory will still haunt your dreams, but it’s a welcome change from all the relived failures and sweaty former scoutmasters. Taurus Apr 21 – May 21 Just when you thought it couldn’t possibly get any worse, the stars confirm that you are correct and it is pretty much as bad as possible. Gemini May 22 – June 21 The clown car may be an overworked reference, but the doctors can think of no better way to describe the constant stream of clowns issuing from your abdominal cavity. Cancer Jun 22 – Jul 22 Ultimately there will be nothing your friends can do for you, putting you in the position of having to find more competent friends. Leo Jul 23 – Aug 22 The stars say that this week will be a time of reflective contemplation, so postpone your plans to rollerskate around naked except for the gas mask. Virgo Aug 23 – Sep 22 Just when all hope is gone, you will find a secret stash of Oreos that actually makes up for quite a lot. Libra Sep 23 – Oct 23 You’re through giving advice to people, to the vast relief of the park rangers tasked with pulling their charred husks out of the volcanoes. Scorpio Oct 24 – Nov 21 You’ll lose both legs in a railroad accident next month, but luckily they’ll only be prosthetic replacements for the ones you’ll lose at the zoo this Thursday. Sagittarius Nov 22 – Dec 21 No one will be able to figure out your enigmatic last words, and the fact that you’ll live in silence for three more years after uttering them makes that somehow cooler. Tuesday Buffet from 6 PM 032 516587 featuring our www.terrace90.com e mail [email protected] 250/133 Soi 90 Hua Hin Authentic American BBQ & Tex-Mex Homemade Breads and Desserts from Our Bakery Great Steaks and Chops Thai Food Best Margaritas West of California Every Day Reasonable Prices 11am - 11pm La