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The Railway Tavern
A cowboy
A Cowboy sitting in a saloon one Saturday night
recognized an elderly man standing at the bar who, in
his day, had the reputation of being the fastest gun in the
West. The young cowboy took a place next to the old
gunslinger, bought him a drink and told him the story of
his great ambition.
‘Do you think you could give me some tips?’ he asked.
The old gunslinger looked him up and down and said,
‘Well, for one thing, you’re wearing your gun too high,
tie the holster a little lower down on your leg cowboy.
Will that make me a better gunfighter?’ asked the young
man. ‘Sure will, ‘replied the old gunslinger.
The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped
out his 44 and shot the bow tie off the piano player.
That’s terrific!’ said the hot shot. ‘Any more tips for me?’
‘Yep,’ said the old man. ‘Cut a notch out of your holster
where the hammer hits it, that’ll give you a smoother
draw’
‘Will that make me a better gunfighter?’ asked the
younger man.
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‘You bet it will,’ said the old gunslinger.
The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood
up, drew his gun in a blur, and then shot a cufflink off the
piano player. ‘Wow!’ exclaimed the cowboy ‘I’m learnin’
somethin’ here. Got any more tips?’
The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the
saloon. ‘See that axle grease over there? Coat your gun
with it.’
The young man went over to the can and smeared some
of the grease on the barrel of his gun. ‘No,’ said the old
gunslinger, ‘I mean smear it all over, handle and all.’
‘Will that make me a better gunfighter?’ asked the young
man.
‘No,’ said the old gunslinger, ‘but when Wyatt Earp gets
done playing the piano, he’s gonna shove that gun right
up your ass, and it won’t hurt as much”.
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