AWOL 2014 Issue 265 10th January | Page 23

Advertise here from only 40 baht per week s&S Soi 94 Indian restaurant Curries from only 75 baht Eat in or Takeaway 081 455 5298 Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 19 A freak electrical fire will break out at a nearby hospital this week, expanding the facility’s burn ward tenfold. Aquarius Jan 20 – Feb 18 Though you will mean to tell a group of friends about the appetizing sirloin steak you had for lunch, a Freudian slip this week instead reveals your torture of four teenage girls in an old abandoned shack. Pisces Feb 19 – Mar 20 Check with Pisces in two weeks for a more detailed and accurate prediction of next week’s events. Aries Mar 21 – Apr 20 A collection of self-penned portmanteaus, the construction of which you’ve always thought rather clever, will offend hundreds of biracial individuals this Thursday. Taurus Apr 21 – May 21 While all may be fair in love and war, many will come out against your egregious use of nerve gas in both. Gemini May 22 – June 21 No matter how much time passes, you’ll never be able to bring yourself to forgive those who have called you unforgiving. Cancer Jun 22 – Jul 22 You never thought you had it in you, nor that you’d have the courage to follow through even if you did, but you’ll totally surprise yourself with next Thursday’s abortion. Leo Jul 23 – Aug 22 You will see yourself in a whole new light this week while desperately failing to locate a single vein inside that downtown McDonald’s bathroom. Virgo Aug 23 – Sep 22 A sinking sense of your own mortality will set in this week after you completely fail to recognize a Simpsons rerun on television. Libra Sep 23 – Oct 23 The alignment of the stars and the planets can only mean one thing this week: You’re looking at a very simplistic, two-dimensional model of our solar system. Scorpio Oct 24 – Nov 21 Badly hurt and in crippling pain, you will see the last 12 seconds of your life flash before your eyes this week. Sagittarius Nov 22 – Dec 21 You’re nervous, your palms are sweaty, and your stomach is full of knots, but don’t worry: Chances are she’s feeling the exact same first-date-rape jitters as you. Tuesday Buffet from 6 PM 032 516587 www.terrace90.com e mail [email protected] 250/133 Soi 90 Hua Hin Authentic American BBQ & Tex-Mex Homemade Breads and Desserts from Our Bakery Gr