BACK of the BOOK
The Break Room
THE WORK-LIFE
SPECTRUM
By Matt Kalaycio, MD
wish we had a better term for the relationship
between work and life, because, in my understanding, “work-life balance” suggests that in
order to have one, you must sacrifice the other.
I don’t believe in such a dichotomy of work and
life; they are intertwined and inseparable.
Work is life, and life is work. I see them as one and
the same. What I strive for is less like work-life balance
and more like work-life integration. My work is a large
component of my life as it is for most anyone in our
profession. However, I do not consider my home life
“not work.”
If you asked my wife what her work-life balance is,
as a stay-at-home mother, she would say her life is her
work. That’s true for me, too. There are plenty of people
who stay home and raise kids. Does that mean they can
only have life balance because they don’t work outside
the home? No – their work is their life.
When I visualize “work” and “life,” I see a Venn diagram, not a perpetual see-saw.
In the work-life balance model, people tend to think
that the sacrifice is one-sided: Family and personal time
suffers due to work obligations. Obviously, if I come to
work, I’m sacrificing time at home with my kids. There’s
simply no way around that. Conversely, the time I spend
with my kids is time I sacrifice from work. When I am
at a soccer match with my kids, I’m not reviewing literature, writing papers, returning phone calls, or answering
emails. Yes, there has to be some compromise/balance
between family time and employer time, but everybody
sacrifices from both sides. I don’t exclusively sacrifice
my personal life for work, and vice versa. I pick and
choose my priorities. We all integrate work and personal
life without even thinking about it.
An Evolving Perspective
My perspective has certainly changed as I’ve gotten
older. I’ve become more circumspect about my priorities. When I was a young, impressionable, naïve pup, I
was much more concerned about getting my next paper
published, seeing the next patient in clinic, or worrying
about how I would treat the next patient.
I was also trying to develop an inpatient leukemia
service at my home institution (Cleveland Clinic) so I
felt it necessary to spend as much time as possible doing
inpatient work to set a standard. To do that, though, I
missed a good friend’s wedding. My determination to
set a good example at work and establish my credentials
as a passionate leukemia doctor won out over my social
commitment. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have done that:
It was far better for me to go to that wedding than to
spend another weekend on the inpatient service. If that
situation were presented to me today, I would choose
differently.
As younger doctors start out, they often want to
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prove their commitment, and their personal lives often suffer. Mine did, and I was lucky to learn relatively
quickly that things had to change. The decisions we
make at the beginning of our careers have large import
for what happens later. At the time, though, we don’t realize how important those decisions ultimately become.
The key to having it all is to create your own definition
of having it all without worrying about other people’s
definition.
My experiences as a leukemia doctor and bone marrow transplanter also contributed to changes in my
outlook. My clinic includes many younger people whose
lives are interrupted with horrible consequences, and
the treatment we give them (even if it cures them) irrevocably changes their life story. It didn’t take me long
to figure out that my original priorities – career reputation above all – were misplaced. I needed to find a way
to spend time with my family, while still managing to
develop my career to provide for their needs. Does that
mean I couldn’t have it all? I suppose that depends on
your definition of “all.” My definition probably differs
from yours, and by my definition, I have it all.
Teaching – and Learning from – the Younger
Generation
In reality, no one becomes a doctor by prioritizing personal life over work. That just doesn’t happen. But, once
you become a doctor, you do have the ability to shift
your priorities. You have to ask yourself the question,
“How can I achieve everything I want in my personal
life and my work life?” It’s not an all-or-nothing deal;
you have to actively decide to blend the two in the proportions you feel most comfortable with.
I believe the way the millennials are approaching
their careers is better than how we baby boomers approached it. Fellows today are much more tuned into
their personal lives, values, and needs than previous
generations. When I came through, the emphasis was
firmly on career at all costs. Our way – and previous
generations’ way – contributed to the horrifying burnout statistics today. I suspect that the burnout statistics
of the future will look much better.
There are three things we should give fellows
throughout their training: scientific knowledge, emotional intelligence, and a sense of leadership.
There is, however, a fourth gift that we cannot give
them: time. Time is something they have to provide for
themselves – the time to spend with their families or on )ѡ