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talking has been taken to a new level in this digital age and it is becoming more and more often. From the rate of growth it has led to great concern for people’s safety. For those who commit the doing, don’t even know they are doing it. Well we don’t blame the user for doing this, but Facebook opened By: Briana McDowell the door for those who have access to it. Whether you’re following a crush, an ex, or even the new crush of an ex (that bitch!), here are some tips for recognizing you’ve officially crossed over into Facebook stalker territory 3. You’ve gone so far
Are You A
Stalker ?
5. You’ve seriously weighed the pros and cons of poking him....
Occasionally the art of Facebook stalking involves knowing when to play it coy. If you leave a message on someone’s wall every hour or every day, they’re likely to realize just how obsessed you are. Likewise, if you poke them often, they’ll know you’re trying to flirt -- and sometimes not trying is exactly what you need to do to get their attention, right? That and posting seemingly effortlessly sexy photos you actually spent hours orchestrating.
1. You check his relationship status as frequently as you check your email
Crushes. Sigh. Maybe today will be the day you scan his Facebook profile only to discover he’s finally broken up with that girlfriend you’ve been making evil eyes at for years. Fingers crossed.
as to stalk someone by proxy.
Want to scrutinize someone you can’t friend, but who happens to be friends with one of your friends? Get them to sympathize with your plight (or just pretend you want to hang out with them), then sign onto their Facebook account and stalk away.
2. You’ve considered making a fake profile just to “accidentally” friend someone.
The really, really desperate solution to accessing the info of someone you can’t friend and your real-life buddies don’t even know: set up a fake profile, message them pretending to be someone nondescript they met once (“You remember me, right? That was such a crazy night!”), and hope they accept your request long enough to stalk the heck out of them before they discretely erase you from their friends list. J U LY 2 0 1 3 / ARIES 97
4. You have to pretend you don’t already know exactly how someone has been doing.
I recently got a Facebook message from a male friend that admitted, oh so sheepily, that he would ask how I’d been if he hadn’t already been following my status updates way too closely. He knew I’d recently had surgery. He knew what I did for the holidays. He even spotted a photo of my tiny Christmas tree, and had begun coveting it. Lucky for him, he happened to be an ex-stalker-ee of mine, not only making him not creepy, but actually kind of adorable.
6. You read wall-to-wall threads you weren’t even a part of
The “wall-to-wall” button was basically created for jealous Facebook stalkers. Click it and stare voyeuristically at a conversation you were entirely absent from. Pick it apart piece by piece. Learn to hate people 98 A R I E S / J U LY 2 0 1 3