Aptavani-9 395
this wedding.’ I tell them,‘ No it does not look bad. People know me and they understand that I am a man of God and that I am not in tune with worldly things.’ But they would insist and say,‘ No but it makes us look bad.’ So then I made one of them understand, I told him,‘ Normally I would not say anything but since you ask I will tell you the truth. If I were to sit in the middle there, and if the jeweler Laxmichand were to come along, I would have to move. Then I would have to move again when Maganbhai Shankarbhai comes. So I have to keep changing my seat, so instead of suffering insults this way, what is wrong in simply standing here with dignity? I will not enter into competition in such a racecourse. I am better off standing here than sitting in the middle and taking the number nine seat and feeling insulted.’ I did not say this directly to him, but I came to the conclusion that only the horse that comes in first, wins the prize and not others. I do not like such races. The one that comes first gets the prize and others that run just as hard and come in second and get nothing. So, he said,‘ That is very shrewd of you.’ I told him,‘ Call it what you want but that is my way.’ He said,‘ You have found a very shrewd way of getting out of it.’
This is‘ our’ art of tackling all situations.‘ We’ do everything; we eat, drink, and eat ice cream with leisure. I sit back and‘ see’ which horse comes first. But I will not run in that race. I will remain the knower and the seer( gnata drashta) of the race. Why would I want to run with those horses?
Still, I did try it once. I have calluses on my feet from when a nail had poked through the sole of my shoes.( Dada is referring to his self-imposed penance that he subjected himself to before Gnan. Following the philosophy of the Kramic path, in search of the Soul, he thought physical penance was necessary. When a nail in his shoe had poked through the inner sole, he left it there, he endured it, entering the race course of penance as seekers do in the Kramic path).