Aptavani-9
35
pacify him. However there would be no insistence on ‘our’ part,
there is complete vitaragata within. Constant vitaragata
(detachment)! There would not be the least bit of pull (bhaav)
towards him or repulsion (abhaav) away from him. And then
we have to tell ‘Dada Bhagwan’, ‘Please grace this man.’ Then,
to the pure Soul, which is separate from ‘Chandulal and
‘Chandulal’s’ mind-body-speech, bhaavkarma-dravyakarma-
nokarma’ ‘we’ request, ‘please shower Your grace on
‘Chandulal’. I make all these connections. Then I remain vitarag
(detached). The other person continues to remain upset and
non-communicative (risavu) and I remain straight. This worldly
interaction continues. He becomes perplexed for a while and
then it all goes away.
Questioner: Then, Dada, is it not true that a man who is
apt to resorting to becoming upset and non-communicative
(risavu), will automatically stop if he does not get any
encouragement for such a behavior?
Dadashri: ‘We’ never encourage such people, not even
a little. Encouragement has a negative effect on such individuals.
Even children will improve if you remain vitarag with them
but by encouraging their upset and non-communicative behavior,
they will get on the wrong path. You need vitaragata (detached
interaction)! Treat them with tender care if they come to you and
do not react if they do not. If they come, hug them gently and
if they get agitated just leave them alone. Then if they come
again, hug them again. You should not concern yourself with the
way they are behaving; you simply have to remain vitarag.
Whatever they do, you should not be concerned about it and
neither should you make a deep mental note (nondha) of it.
Questioner: That is a tremendous thing, Dada.
Dadashri: There should be no deep mental note (nondha)
whatsoever. Nondha creates conflicts. Do not make a mental
note of anyone. We scold all these people but ‘we’ never make