ONLINE DOES NOT
EQUAL THE WHOLE
PICTURE
We are fortunate to live in a time
when we can stay connected to
our loved ones from anywhere,
run a business completely online,
and form new relationships with
people on the other side of the
world. The problem is that online
communication has also created
a new disconnect from real life.
Here’s an example:
A few years ago, a boyfriend
of mine was going through a
major rough patch and would
spend hours scrolling through
his Facebook feed, looking at
pictures from other people’s
summer vacations, baby pictures,
or posts about accomplishments.
He’d say, “See, everyone is out
exploring the world and doing
important things. What am I
doing with my life?” All of his time
on Facebook was spent viewing
the lives of his friends—and even
people he barely knew—through
the lens of envy and jealousy.
32 | Eydis Magazine
But here’s the thing: social
media is not reality. Everyone
expresses the best parts of
their lives online, when in fact
we all have plenty of not-sohappy times—they are just not
shareworthy like the birth of a
baby, a graduation, or a family
outing. The dark side of seeing
others’ positives online is that
we lose some sense of actuality.
Our problems seem like the only
problems because everyone is
unconsciously playing into the
illusion that our social media
profiles are real life, and that is
simply not the case.
No one is happy all the time,
but that’s the beauty of life with
its multitude of ups and downs.
This must be remembered and
embraced. If you find yourself
comparing or feeling envious of
happy things other people post
online, remember that it isn’t
the whole picture. Then, make
an effort to feel joy for that
person and wish them well in
the rest of their day. Trust me,
I know it’s not always an easy
action to take, especially when
you feel envious of what they
have, but making an effort is
what matters.
We don’t know how many of
those new moms are dealing
with postpartum depression. We
don’t know what types of issues
a family might be struggling
with as they Instagram that
smiling picture. We don’t see the
depression that businesswoman
struggles with while building her
success. People don’t know that
I’ve posted goofy pictures with
my dog moments before I had a
nervous breakdown.
ENGAGE WITH
A PURPOSE
Use your social media time to
create posts that mean something
to you or to engage with those
you care about. If you’re scrolling
through the newsfeed without
much of a purpose, it makes
you vulnerable to a feeling of
disconnection.
So connect with other people
who share your interests, join a
group or two, and get involved
with discussions. I have made
some amazing business and
personal connections online
just by searching for groups
who share my passions. You
can even find private support
groups on Facebook that
provide a safe place to speak
with others who understand
your struggles. This allows you
to use Facebook as a tool for
making a difference, getting
inspired, and feeling a part of
something bigger than yourself.
TAKE A BREAK
WHEN YOU NEED IT
This doesn’t have to be a full-on
Facebook cleanse (although that
can be beneficial as well). What I
mean is take daily breaks to checkin with yourself. Do you check social
media when you are feeling sad?
When you’re avoiding something?
I find myself starting to scroll
aimlessly when I’m working on a
challenging work project or feeling
anxious. This is when social media
is used as a tool for distraction or
fulfillment without a purpose, which
isn’t serving yourself.
If this happens to you, take a
moment to step back from the
computer screen and engage in
some offline self-love:
•
Spend a few minutes
meditating. Breathe deeply
and focus on your breath or a
positive mantra for your day.
•
•
•
Grab your journal, or just a
piece of paper, and spend at
least five minutes writing about
how you feel. Then spend at
least five more minutes writing
about what is important to you.
If it helps, listen to music that
inspires you.
Go for a short walk. Pay
attention to the different
colors, shapes, and sounds
that nature is sending you.
And let yourself be thankful
for them.
If you’re feeling lonely, go
somewhere with people. This
could mean grabbing coffee
with a friend or simply being
out around other humans.
Remember that whatever you’re
going through, there are other
people in the world experiencing
the same struggles.
There is no magic pill for making
your problems immediately
disappear, and Facebook
is no exception. But just as
mindfulness and gratitude can
help you manifest your path to
peace, using social media can
be a joyful experience when it’s
used with positive intentions
and appreciation.
Lauren provides
freelance writing
and editing services
for health and
wellness warriors
at LaurenEStewart.
com. She is also a
plant-based blogger
and healthy dessert
ebook author at Veggie in a Jiffy. She loves
connecting with other passionate people,
hanging with her pets (two dogs and a cat),
and enjoying a nice cup of coffee.
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