ALLURE MEDICAL - all•u Magazine all·u Magazine Spring 2017 | Page 17

“In his own example of despair, Emerald was
able to realize that he had been living his life
through the eyes of a victim, wondering why
everything bad had happened to him."
to fight, flee, or freeze. The Victim
may become pessimistic in life, always
expecting another disappointment
to emerge right around the corner.
The Persecutor, on the other hand,
has the mentality that he or she must
win rather than risk stumbling and
becoming a Victim. Meanwhile,
the Rescuer is determined to assist
others lest becoming unneeded and
falling into the role of Victim.
CHOOSING POSITIVITY
From this dysfunctional model,
Emerald drew up a new model called
The Empowerment Dynamic, which
allows all three points of the “dreaded
drama triangle” to experience growth
and maturity in overcoming adverse
situations. Under the TED paradigm,
the Victim transitions into the role of
Creator, seeking to choose a future of
hope and resiliency rather than one that
is trapped in misfortune and does not
allow for change. The Persecutor evolves
from a mindset of domination to one of
self-awareness and empowerment (the
Challenger). And the Rescuer no longer
must save others, but, as a Coach, can
simply encourage them and provide
positive reinforcement throughout
their journey. The trick is to eventually
be able to answer the following three
questions in a productive manner:
you act in ways that perpetuate
drama or empower others?
3. What actions are you taking? Are
you simply reacting to problems
thrown at you, or are you proactively
trying to create healthier outcomes?
Many observers have come to swear by
Emerald’s message, helping to spur his
modest fable of self-empowerment into
a mini-empire of books, workbooks,
courses, and leadership training
programs. Participants in his programs
tell stories of dramatically turning their
lives around or freeing their workplace
from unnecessary drama and conflict.
Today, Emerald, along with his wife
Donna Zajonc, now heads the Bainbridge
Leadership Center, coaching companies
on leadership issues. He is also a business
facilitator, public speaker, and author.
businesswoman, and philanthropist—
one of the most successful and revered
personalities in the public domain.
How did a woman so victimized
achieve the tremendous giving spirit
that she is now known for? How
did she not succumb to her early
misfortunes and assume that a life
dream in her situation was impossible?
Although she probably didn’t know
it, Winfrey was living out the ideas
behind The Empowerment Dynamic,
acknowledging her humble and
unfortunate beginnings, but using that
information to bring strength not only
to herself but also to her vast following
as well. Clearly, Winfrey had an inner
strength that propelled her belief in
herself and allowed her to dream of a
boundless future for herself and make
TED IN THE REAL WORLD
1. Where are you putting your
focus? Do you create the
outcomes you want or are you
overwhelmed with problems? Not only can TED be a powerful tool
in workplace interactions but it can be
applied to many other relationships—
with spouses, adult children, friends,
and other important people in your
life. Let’s look to Oprah Winfrey as an
example. Winfrey was born into rural
poverty to a single mother, was allegedly
subject to sexual molestation as a child
by three different men, became a teen
mother for a short time until the death
of her infant son, and was passed from
relative to relative as though a burden
to clothe, feed, and raise. At the age of
thirteen, she ran away from home—and
it would have been hard to blame her.
2. How are you relating to others,
your experience, and yourself? Do We all know Winfrey today as a
successful talk show host, actress,
FIGURE 1
TED* THE EMPOWERMENT DYNAMIC
2017 SPRING
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