“ Ronni B and the Corgi Adventure ” Lorelei M & Leila Y | 8th Grade
Once upon a time in a far off land there lived a mysterious overlord and his pack of rabid dogs . But these weren ’ t just dogs … oh oh oh no no ma ’ am ! These were CORGIS . Ŋ^ • ع • ^Ŋ . In a village over yonder called Mount Rageous there was a man named Ronni B who was really evil and mean to corgis Ŋ^ • ع • ^Ŋ but he secretly loved them and really deep down wanted an army of his own stubby little dogs . The true reason he hated corgis Ŋ^ • ع • ^Ŋ so much was because he wished his legs were as stubby as theirs , but he could never admit his jealousy , so he turned to hatred . This made him bitter because he wanted to take over his village because he didn ’ t support the horse patriarchy he was in , but the only way to do that was to get an army of corgis Ŋ^ • ع • ^Ŋ ( obviously ) which he didn ’ t really want to do because he wanted to make sure everyone knew he hated the furry little beasts Ŋ^ • ع • ^Ŋ . But , he knew this was the only way to take over his village , so he set off that Sunday morn ’ in search for the little stubby monsters Ŋ^ • ع • ^Ŋ , and began his journey sailing across the dark seas .
One fact about Ronni B is that in his spare time ( when he isn ’ t hating on the horse patriarchy and corgis Ŋ^ • ع • ^Ŋ ), Ronni B enjoys looking at globes in order to prepare for his takeover . Because of all the thousands of hours he has spent staring at globes , Ronni B has developed a “ mental GPS ”. He always knows where he is going , how to get to his destination , and he even knows a bit of what the terrain will look like . Therefore , Ronni B decided that he no longer needed a map while sailing . But to his surprise , Ronni B came across a mysterious island that he had never seen before on his globes . Ronni B raised a single brow , questioning why he didn ’ t recognize this silly place . Could it have been his memory ? No , his memory is pristine as a squirrel . Are his globes wrong ? No , he got them from the biggest Walmart in Mount Rageous . Ronni B ’ s boat slowly began to sail closer and closer to the island . The wind blew his freshly shampooed hair out of his face except it didn ’ t because he doesn ’ t have hair but the wind still blew his eyebrows out of the way because he has eyebrows .
“ Land Ho !” He screamed and pointed to the orphic looking island before him .
“ Ay Ronni ! It would seem we have reached Mount Rageousageouscorgiageous !” Said his devoted sidekick Eric ( not k or ck ). Also yes he has a sidekick because world domination is a long and tedious process and it ’ s nice to have someone to keep track of all your files for you
50 a little gray building