Airsoft Action May 2020 | Página 57

AA SPECIAL MENTAL HEALTH words - or other people’s words - some kind of helpful. WHEREVER YOU GO, THERE YOU ARE At the age of 46, I’ve suffered with depression and anxiety for about 15 years. Some days I struggle to find a reason to get out of bed; other days I wish I’d never bothered. But one Sunday out of four, I have an obligation to meet with my team for a day of airsoft. Sometimes it’s epic, other times it’s crap but it always gives me something to hang my month around other than my mundane and ultimately unfulfilling 9-5 existence. But it’s not always been this way for me. Long story short; with no history of depression, it hit me in 2004 when, in the space of 12 months I lost my home, my spouse, a parent and my career. But that’s just my story. Many of our airsoft comrades that have served in the armed forces will have far more harrowing stories to tell. As Paul Yelland says, “Every player has a story behind them and unfortunately, some are incredibly upsetting. Airsoft can be their escape for a few hours where they can find friendship and have fun”. TRIGGER POINTS Beyond working through therapy, the trigger - no pun intended - for depression almost doesn’t matter because the end result is the same: your life will never be the same again. Scientists are still unsure whether individuals are predisposed to depression because of chemical reactions in the brain or behavioural patterns, but it affects more of the population than most people realise. Before I’d experienced depression for myself, I had no idea how debilitating it could be. It is literally like your brain undermines itself at every turn. Nothing is ever good enough even for yourself and everything is too much for you. Suddenly, the phrase “Wherever you go, there you are” becomes altogether less comforting. LET THE BELLENDS RING! Life has taught me not to trust people, so I don’t make friends easily, but airsoft is helping me overcome that. Solo airsoft is a fine pursuit, but it’s so much better with friends. I took a risk and reached out through my local site’s Facebook page looking for chums to swap tales of derring-do in the safe zone. And it’s one of the best things I’ve ever done. They may be a bunch of bellends (they might be reading this, after all), but not only did I join a squad of similarly middle-aged, out-of-shape twats, but I’ve also made some genuine friends. Although they may change their minds when they read that… I’ve met some good people to casually chat with as part of my wider circle online - about sniping, batteries or scopes - but I’ve also made some great friends in the real world. Friends that I can not only coordinate with on a two-pronged attack, or to watch my back when I’m reloading, but friends that will share a mag or battery with me if I need it. Friends that would even help me move house …maybe. But definitely friends that will check in when they know the chips are down. Airsoft has given me just the tiniest taste of the brotherhood that active personnel enjoy. Of course, it isn’t the same, before anyone calls me delusional, but it might just be “similar”. I HAVE A USE FOR YOU So, while mental health is still a taboo subject for many, what is it about airsoft that breaks down those barriers? For starters, “Gunday Sunday” is outside the norm - you “MY DEPRESSION WAS TRIGGERED WHEN MY MUM DIED - WE WERE SUCH A CLOSE FAMILY - AND I’VE BEEN ON ANTIDEPRESSANTS EVER SINCE. “I’M PRESCRIBED DIAZEPAM FOR WHEN I FEEL AN ANXIETY ATTACK COMING ON, BUT THE ABSOLUTE BEST REMEDY OUT OF ALL IS GETTING MY GEAR READY ON SATURDAY TO GO PLAY AIRSOFT AND SHOOT PEOPLE. ALL LEGAL, ALL HIGH-PRESSURE AND WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE, SPENDING TIME HAVING BANTER WITH LIKE MINDED LUNATICS THAT ALSO ENJOY SHOOTING PEOPLE AND GETTING SHOT. I CAN GUARANTEE THAT NOBODY IS HAVING DEEP AND DARK THOUGHTS WHILST OUT IN THE FIELD OR THE SAFE ZONE. “MANY MENTAL HEALTH PROBLEMS MANIFEST FROM LACK OF PHYSICAL AND MENTAL STIMULATION, WHICH GIVES THE HUMAN MIND TIME AND SPACE TO PRODUCE THOUGHTS AND IMAGES - AND BEFORE YOU REALISE IT, THE DARK CLOUD HAS CLOSED IN AROUND YOU ONCE MORE. “I’M TALKING FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE - AND NOT JUST FROM RECENT WORK IN SECURE NHS MENTAL HEALTH HOSPITALS WHERE I SPENT TWO YEARS SUPPORTING ADULTS TO IDENTIFY, UNDERSTAND AND FIGHT A VARIETY OF CONDITIONS. “IT’S NOT THAT EASY TO FIGHT YOUR WAY THROUGH IT, BUT WITH RIF IN HAND, YOU ARE EMPOWERED AND WITH YOUR TEAMMATES FIGHTING THE ENEMY, YOU FIND YOURSELF NEEDED. WITHIN MOMENTS, THE CLOUD HAS DISAPPEARED. AN ADRENALINE RUSH WILL LIKELY WASH AWAY THE BLUES AND WHAT BETTER RUSH THAN RUNNING INTO A HAIL OF (PLASTIC) BULLETS? “AIRSOFT IS A HUGE DISTRACTION FROM REAL LIFE. IT HAS HELPED ME AND I KNOW OF MANY OTHERS THAT HAVE EXPERIENCED THE SAME RELEASE OF ANGER, FRUSTRATION, LOW SELF-ESTEEM AND MANY, MANY OTHER INVISIBLE CONDITIONS THROUGH OUR SPORT.” LEZ LEE, AA CONTRIBUTOR www.airsoftaction.net 35