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His message on behalf of the unforgotten
life had remained vivid in Doc ’ s mind .
After delivering his gifts now , Doc told me , “ I wanted to write the letter and create a flower that would never wither to celebrate him . And I wanted to send what I knew would be his message and the message of all those who did not return to their loved ones . I wanted to do it on this day , Valentine ’ s Day , because it ’ s a day dedicated to sharing love .”
As I listened , I was trying to fold my own thoughts and emotions into what I had been watching . I felt honored to have been invited to this moment . Then I began to sense my eternal questions rushing in , returning . What is it like to witness the life of a brother ebb away ? What does that do to the witnessing heart and mind ? It must be its own kind of severe wounding ! How does anyone ever heal from that ?
And how is it we are able to reconcile the dark realities of war with honor and patriotic commitment ? What – I asked myself or maybe a Higher Power – could this moment of struggling to this message of love do to help someone like Doc heal ? Will it let him finally be free to live , to put down the burden of what is now too simply called “ survivor ’ s guilt ”? Might this man I ’ ve known as someone in pain finally enjoy his family again ? Could he now let go of his self-inflicted separation from life and finally , emotionally , breathe ?
Doc visits our Wall South often in the quiet darkness of night . The sound of his motorcycle roaring awake in the wee hours rarely disturbs me . If it does , I know where he is headed and that my prayers for him are riding with him .
The Veteran posts his message
NO MAGIC CURE
There is no potion , no pill , no amount of therapy that erases memory of the last moments of those brothers and sisters in arms . Maybe all the questions I want to ask Doc will remain unanswered . His is a journey in which I am proud to participate , insofar as I can . It is sometimes difficult ; things often do not “ add up ” maybe never will . But this path is his , unique to him . I am grateful for the moments he laughs , when he genuinely checks into life .
I ’ ve begun to see that every day is a gift to each of us . Helping those who threw themselves into harm ’ s way on our behalf yet managed to make it home – that is our mission as friend , family member , or partner . Their stoicism can be so honorable . But sometimes remaining stoic only masks pain that , left unchecked , destroys joy and enthusiasm and even relationships . Too often , it destroys the one who puts on the mask .
AHERO provides moments of genuine healing from the visible and invisible wounds of war . Moment to moment , the volunteers and contributors who power the AHERO engine save lives by organizing and facilitating the kind of enriching activities to those who have suffered much in our name . Basic always to these moments is the encouragement felt by the many hurting Veterans AHERO ’ s volunteers manage , through those who contribute , to bring to its events to partake of the joy and camaraderie they find there .
As humans , we all hurt sometimes . Veterans of military service often recall moments of
extreme trauma and may have triggers that initiate acting out of such trauma in ways others can ’ t understand . To counter the potentially deadly upshot of this is AHERO ’ s mission . Providing moments that encourage sharing of thoughts and experience that lead to self-understanding and acceptance is perhaps its greatest tool to accomplish this . I
I ’ ve learned much in getting to know individuals like Doc through AHERO . I ’ ve learned that its mantra , “ Bring Veterans together to form friendships in settings that heal ,” works . It sounds simple . Can something so deep be simple ? Maybe . But what I ’ ve really learned over the years of watching AHERO carry out its mission is that the results it achieves are priceless .
A special note from the writer to SSG Michael “ Doc ” DeVito , Special Forces ( Ret ): Thank you , Doc , for sharing your moment of healing and for your continued participation and support of the AHERO community .
A rose at dawn ( Vetarans Memorial Park , Pensacola ). AHERO MAGAZINE SUMMER 2021 23