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‘ Complicated grief ’
Demand for grief counselling surged during the pandemic .
By NCA NewsWire
When Angie Wraight ’ s husband of 38 years died in her arms during the pandemic last year , she felt lost .
A “ wonderful ” palliative care team had helped keep her husband Brian comfortable through his cancer battle , but when the rush of nurses and doctors stopped after his death , the silence seemed deafening . “ I was lost , absolutely lost ,” Wraight said . “ He died in our lounge room . I couldn ’ t go into the lounge room , I couldn ’ t go into our bedroom , I couldn ’ t cook in the kitchen : I was just struggling with everything .”
The pandemic meant Wraight could not be beside her husband during his cancer treatments and her grief was compounded after his death when in-person visits were banned during Melbourne ’ s lockdown .
Agreeing to join a grief counselling group run by the Palliative Care South East helped her through some dark times .
“ The group was immense in getting me through what I needed to and getting me through everything that was so hard during a pandemic as well ,” she said .
“ It ’ s one of those things your friends really can ’ t talk to you about — they just don ’ t know what to say , whereas the counsellors can get the right information across to you , so you can open up and not be angry or destructive to yourself .
“ It was absolutely critical — they really did save me .”
Wraight said the counselling taught her to deal constructively with her loss alongside others experiencing the same thing .
One year on from losing her husband in November last year , the “ rollercoaster ” of emotions still happens but she is learning to slowly handle it .
“ When you ’ re really flat and you ’ ve got nowhere to turn and you ’ ve just got that black hole , they ’ ve given me things to get myself out of it , so I can think there ’ s a positive light coming through and it will get better .”
The unprecedented impact of Covid has meant feelings of grief and loss are often compounded , because people are unable to follow their usual traditions around death and dying .
Palliative Care Australia warned in a paper that insufficient support after the death of a loved one could cause negative impacts on wellbeing , physical health , mental health and financial security .
In normal times , about 10 per cent of bereaved people are at high risk of complex grief issues but this is predicted to rise to 20 per cent post-Covid , with greater demand expected for grief and bereavement services , the organisation said .
Non-profit Palliative Care South East experienced a surge in the need for bereavement counselling over the pandemic .
“ It ’ s preventive
health without requiring hospital admissions .
Demand jumped 30 per cent last year and a further 30 per cent this year , chief executive Kelly Rogerson said .
“ The services have all experienced a significant uplift in demand and we expect it will continue ,” Rogerson said .
“ We used to on average support one or two people in a family but we ’ re seeing whole families that are needing support .”
Rogerson said more people were presenting with “ complicated grief ” caused by the lack of usual social networks during lockdown .
“ Funeral processes and coming together , and celebrating the life of someone haven ’ t been able to be had , and people are experiencing significant amounts of guilt , sadness and grief ,” she said . “ What we ’ re seeing at the moment is people experiencing the anniversary from last year reaching out to us , 12 months on from the funeral or anniversary of their loved one since last year ’ s lockdown . “ We ’ re expecting that all to continue on to next year at the very least . “ Grief ’ s a really normal emotion : the problem is when it takes over your life and you can ’ t do anything else — obviously you need a bit of help and support to get through that .”
At the same time demand is expected to increase , the service ’ s lease on its current building will expire in September .
A new facility is being built in Melbourne ’ s outer east but another $ 2m is needed to provide counselling rooms .
Rogerson says the service otherwise won ’ t be able to meet demand for bereavement support , potentially placing more burden on the mental health system .
“ We won ’ t be able to meet the demand and people are going to go without — that ’ s my biggest concern ,” she said .
“ They ’ ll end up in the mental health system , putting a further burden on what we already know are services significantly under pressure .
“ If we can help support people in the community and keep them out of needing seeing psychiatrists and psychologists by providing them grief counselling , it ’ s preventive health without requiring hospital admissions and further ongoing care .” ■
4 agedcareinsite . com . au