ABUSE_MAGAZINE_ID_ Iowa Issue 2015 | Page 4

SCHOLARSHIP WINNER The Face In The Mirror ABUSE Magazine wants to congratulate Fantazia Harris-Gully, our High School graduate from Fort Madison High School in Fort Madison, IA. ABUSE Magazine and our staff wants to congratulate her for winning the ABUSE Scholarship and we encourage her to pursuit her academic goals. We also would like to encourage future seniors to participate in our essay contest. I believe that mental and verbal abuse are both major problems in modem day society. I see it all around me and deal with it in the form of racism every day; it’s as much a part of my life as eating and breathing. When I look in the mirror, the first thing I see is a human being. I’ve got all the characteristics of one, but unfortunately that’s not enough. The first thing people see is the color of my skin. It’s brown, though it’s called black, which never made much sense to me. When I was little, I didn’t really feel much different from everyone else. I realized that my skin color was different from some people, but it didn’t seem to matter. To me we were all just people, the end. I believe racism is learned, not a natural reaction. Where I live the population is predominantly white. My aunt exposed me to endless rants about “Whites, Jews, and Mexicans”. I’d get mad at her, but I’d never say anything. I know that people aren’t all nice or all mean either; like the entire human race in general. When I was little my life was simple, uncomplex, and joyful I hadn’t yet experienced the hatred, anger, and irrational fear of being different. My aunt tells me I act too white, from being around them too much. She says that I try to dress, act, and look like ‘’them’’. Once when I was really excited to tell her about my day at school. I suppose I said the words ‘’like”, and “awesome” too many times, because she cut me off mid-sentence. She’s the type of woman who can stop you cold with just one stare. She got in my face and started screaming, “You’re not white, do you realize how stupid you sound when you talk like that?! You walk around like you’re better than everyone else. Little Miss Priss, sticking your nose up at us. WAKE UP, YOU’RE BLACK. And guess what THEY DON’T EVEN LIKE YOU!” Then in a quiet, menacing voice, she said, “They aren’t your friends. There is no such thing as a friend... “. Then she continued on with her same old speech about how there’s no such thing as a friend, only people willing to smile in your face then stab you in the back, especially White people. I wasn’t trying to act white, I was just being myself. 4 | Iowa - 2014 | abusemagazine.org At school I got teased for the way my hair, and clothes looked. But mostly for not “being black enough.” Am I not black enough just because I don’t talk fast and overuse slang when I speak? I don’t know the lyrics to every rap song, and I hate watermelon. My skin isn’t any lighter due to these facts, but I’m still “not black enough”. People say I’m the whitest black person they know. I sat through black jokes, and never said a thing, sometimes I’d laugh just to fit in. They call me Oreo, since I appear black on the outside, but I act white. I was teased so much that I began expecting it. The hardest part was pretending like it didn’t hurt. I was emotionally raw, and mentally prepared for war every day. War with my aunt, the kids at school/work, and the war I could never escape ... with myself I felt like everything I said and did was wrong everyday just for existing. On the inside, I began to truly hate everything about myself I felt broken and insignificant. I didn’t know who I was. People have an expectation for who I’m supposed to be and I don’t comply. I felt like something was wrong with me. I blamed myself because it was my fault in my mind. Then I became angry, because why should I feel bad for trying to find my place in this world? My aunt tries to instill pride in me, though she tells me I’m not good enough. At school and work kids tell me I act white, yet they call me their ‘’black friend”. Why use a word to describe me if it’s inaccurate? The thing that bothered me most is when I find something I’m really good at, I never get credit. Like track for instance; I was a good sprinter and I loved to run. However, when I’d talk about it I’d get cut me off and told, ‘’Well you’re black, you’re supposed to be fast.” I work really hard for what I want, yet I reap no reward. My point it that mental and verbal abuse (racism) are alive and thriving in the world around us every day, so I only ask that we all be a little more conscious of our involvement in it. Fantazia Harris-Gully Fort Madison High School - Fort Madison, IA